There are a myriad of well-trod paths away from heartbreak. You can go the Bridget Jones'/Cathy cartoon route and eat single serving Duncan Hines microwaveable cakes alone while listening to London Grammar. You can declare your friends BETTER THAN ANY MAN! over brunch, or have an temporarily esteem-empowering but… » 1/28/14 3:00pm 1/28/14 3:00pm

Not to exaggerate too terribly much, but we are all hyperbolic as fuck now. No, most things hardly qualify as truly "awesome" in spite of rampant use of the word, and checking out someone's Facebook photos, the ones they posted deliberately with the explicit understanding (or hope) that they would be looked at does not… » 12/19/13 6:25pm 12/19/13 6:25pm

You have may have noticed that there's something different in the air lately — the crisp scent of fall decay, a little cinnamon spice, and the odd sensation that your significant other suddenly despises the existence of your face. That's right, it's Breakup Season, that tenuous handful of weeks just up to the holidays… » 12/02/13 11:30am 12/02/13 11:30am

» 10/12/13 1:30pm 10/12/13 1:30pm

I’m a 28-year-old professional, and my relationship of five years recently ended. The breakup was friendly, mature, heart breaking and complicated. His family was my family. We had shared assets to divvy up, an apartment to set a timeline on moving out of, and long-formed habits to break like talking to each other… » 10/12/13 1:30pm 10/12/13 1:30pm

One silver lining of getting your feelings stomped all over, is that post-heartbreak, people tend to be forgiving if you must cope by acting like a shithead for awhile. And while there are plenty of ways to act like a self-destructive mess in the wake of a traumatic life event — drinking excessively, crying… » 9/09/13 4:00pm 9/09/13 4:00pm

Welcome to Friendzone, Jezebel's column devoted to dealing with the valuable people in your life who you're not humping. Got an issue and looking for guidance? Email friendzone@jezebel.com. » 6/24/13 6:00pm 6/24/13 6:00pm

When it comes to getting over a breakup, you can be a paragon of badassery, restraint, high-roadism and all-around transcendence, or you can be a mopey trainwreck who lies around feeling like shit, trudging the slow road to recovery in real time. But like everything in the world now, if it's all too much to handle, you … » 5/06/13 5:20pm 5/06/13 5:20pm

Getting dumped is the shittiest of the shit. After all, someone you really like, or possibly even love, has just told you that the last thing they want to keep looking at is your dumb face. Or maybe you already can't stand the fucker — it still sucks when they beat you to the finish line. And this is why it's no… » 5/02/13 5:40pm 5/02/13 5:40pm