(As if you needed it) here is further proof that the Bachelor franchise is full of lies and shadowy secrets: Andi Dorfman and her chosen prince Josh Murray have split up, mere days after posing as a couple together on the "red carpet" of The Bachelor premiere.
Brace yourselves, Notebook fans: Nicholas Sparks and Cathy, his wife of 25 years, have separated.
How would you like to go on a two-week vacation with a complete stranger? It's not free, and you don't have any say on the destination or the accommodations. But you do get to provide comfort to a broken-hearted dude on his would-be honeymoon, you lucky duck.
], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--NvXMUKV2--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_358,q_80,w_636/xfsgdywedhlkp9lyzi4c.png, (small)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--ezp3Lbv1--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_180,q_80,w_320/xfsgdywedhlkp9lyzi4c.png, (medium)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--rngXTzKX--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_77,q_80,w_137/xfsgdywedhlkp9lyzi4c.png, (large)])
Inexplicably, for the second time in a matter of months, another California woman has had to be rescued from a man's chimney. Ladies, can we not?
It's winter season, but there are four other seasons allegedly converging as we speak: If you're in a relationship, you're straying. If you're not committed, you want to be. If things are serious, you might be popping the question. And if they are too serious, they may be ending.
], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--uufa35us--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_358,q_80,w_636/bi0emor3a89vlivqmzyl.jpg, (small)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--Ump41Wwt--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_180,q_80,w_320/bi0emor3a89vlivqmzyl.jpg, (medium)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--V55y3HSB--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_77,q_80,w_137/bi0emor3a89vlivqmzyl.jpg, (large)])
It is the road most traveled: You partner off. The two of you move in together, get hitched or make a Kurt-n-Goldie-style life commitment to one another. You buy some throw pillows and if you didn't already have a pet, you go and find yourself a fur baby. Maybe after the two of you have realized you're capable of…
], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--pN_RNu-i--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_358,q_80,w_636/x1yhadphxuin3ff8mnig.jpg, (small)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--Yj5UN7cc--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_180,q_80,w_320/x1yhadphxuin3ff8mnig.jpg, (medium)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--Y6RA3YP_--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_77,q_80,w_137/x1yhadphxuin3ff8mnig.jpg, (large)])
Merry Christmas! Happy Holidays! 'Tis the season to be jolly! And to post ads on Craigslist complaining about the crap your ex left behind when they dumped you.
], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--FCrayjLb--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_center,h_358,q_80,w_636/umkcledpe0xlqykdmtvy.jpg, (small)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--wCZ9o9xo--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_center,h_180,q_80,w_320/umkcledpe0xlqykdmtvy.jpg, (medium)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--NqYRr9aS--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_center,h_77,q_80,w_137/umkcledpe0xlqykdmtvy.jpg, (large)])
Is there possibly anything worse than an awkward run-in with an ex you're not quite ready to see yet? In terms of awkardness, this scenario is probably topped by the dreaded "accidentally walking in on your parents having sex" or drunkenly showing up at a police station at 2 a.m., demanding they "fetch your royal…
], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--Y1agken4--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_358,q_80,w_636/pwlndtefeamlswid7kn4.jpg, (small)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--ld-POsEB--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_180,q_80,w_320/pwlndtefeamlswid7kn4.jpg, (medium)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--dQ7d2oIJ--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_77,q_80,w_137/pwlndtefeamlswid7kn4.jpg, (large)])
Debbie Lopez dumped Joseph Torres, but kept the engagement ring. He sued to get it back, but a judge ruled Lopez could keep it because Torres never "properly" proposed when he gifted Lopez the $10,000 ring. The one she wore on her left hand? On her ring finger? You know, like any old gift ring?
], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--_6ScrVqP--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_358,q_80,w_636/g360qn5rvsuigsraw6bw.jpg, (small)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--f7qD2XmU--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_180,q_80,w_320/g360qn5rvsuigsraw6bw.jpg, (medium)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--RadKjAvH--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_77,q_80,w_137/g360qn5rvsuigsraw6bw.jpg, (large)])
A woman in China who had just been dumped by her boyfriend decided to go grab some comfort food from KFC to deal with the pain and ended up staying at the restaurant for a week straight because she "needed time to think." Don't even pretend like you haven't been there.
], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--vxVXCJbR--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_358,q_80,w_636/rphel7mhbeqvo8umk4rn.png, (small)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--S4y1x3zz--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_180,q_80,w_320/rphel7mhbeqvo8umk4rn.png, (medium)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--09EhCnuS--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_77,q_80,w_137/rphel7mhbeqvo8umk4rn.png, (large)])
Boy meets girl. Boy and girl date. Boy and girl break up. Boy, desperate to get his girl back, makes a batshit insane website. We have found that website and it is gut-wrenchingly pathetic, mind-bogglingly clueless. It wouldn't be out of place in a police report.
], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--8pBsx45c--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_358,q_80,w_636/rpvudnb9qnyrnwfvsega.png, (small)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--EYzyFRxu--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_180,q_80,w_320/rpvudnb9qnyrnwfvsega.png, (medium)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--eq7cL8FP--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_77,q_80,w_137/rpvudnb9qnyrnwfvsega.png, (large)])
Breakups are responsible for some of the world's best pop songs and worst poetry. And most memorable stories.
Conventional wisdom usually instructs jilted lovers to do anything but fixate on their ex: Get busy, volunteer, sleep around, move to Finland. But what if instead you were encouraged to (anonymously) dive deep into the rabbit hole of your pain and — get this — stay as long as it takes? Now you can.
], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--2Z0RTeFC--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_358,q_80,w_636/wrqlnp06t36xmts4ovzd.jpg, (small)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--Nn-hOhjv--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_180,q_80,w_320/wrqlnp06t36xmts4ovzd.jpg, (medium)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--H8S-srVq--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_77,q_80,w_137/wrqlnp06t36xmts4ovzd.jpg, (large)])
Farewell, Zachelle.
], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--38bUP4x---/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_358,q_80,w_636/xd29s2k4um468zubrmmd.jpg, (small)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--AYe0GStq--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_180,q_80,w_320/xd29s2k4um468zubrmmd.jpg, (medium)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--Ev7XOdeM--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_77,q_80,w_137/xd29s2k4um468zubrmmd.jpg, (large)])
Jennifer Lawrence is reportedly citing "busy schedules" as the reason behind breaking things off with that dude she's been going out with for awhile. You know that guy.... from the thing? Was it The Avengers? Nah, I think it was X-Men. Yes, it was definitely X-Men.
You know the story: You move in with someone, start combining your lives. You're not married, but you share expenses, purchase furniture/art, even get pets or have children. You think if it doesn't work out, you can just walk away without the stigma or cost of divorce. Only it is a lot like divorce, and can still be…
What rhymes with "desperate?"
], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--MP4VGj2O--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_358,q_80,w_636/vse6lmhmlq5icpfcdf8j.jpg, (small)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--mOlwh3aL--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_180,q_80,w_320/vse6lmhmlq5icpfcdf8j.jpg, (medium)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--4kbvN2q0--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_77,q_80,w_137/vse6lmhmlq5icpfcdf8j.jpg, (large)])
After 18 years of marriage and a couple of years of rumors about issues in their marriage, Melanie Griffith and Antonio Banderas are getting a divorce.
], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--XPjKZB50--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_358,q_80,w_636/dtpryxf8zxegwzrw6vm6.jpg, (small)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--POoRjeEV--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_180,q_80,w_320/dtpryxf8zxegwzrw6vm6.jpg, (medium)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--SSzrNgZI--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_77,q_80,w_137/dtpryxf8zxegwzrw6vm6.jpg, (large)])
Musician and writer Dave Bidini was just minding his business in a cafe getting a sandwich, like you do, when he realized he was right next to a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad, very classic break up. So he decided to the Lord's work and share this humanizing tale with the masses.
], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--HVXAFGkb--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_358,q_80,w_636/j0zz579angzntacqa41k.jpg, (small)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--hl8Dbtgg--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_180,q_80,w_320/j0zz579angzntacqa41k.jpg, (medium)], [http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--GCEMHjhB--/c_fill,fl_progressive,g_north,h_77,q_80,w_137/j0zz579angzntacqa41k.jpg, (large)])
I'm offering you this "brake up" note from a little girl named Rachel as a template for you to use in all other future breakups. Because it pretty much nails it.
