Horrifying Tumor With Teeth Removed from Newborn Baby's Brain

What's up, brain-havers!? Feeling a little less-than-fresh? Maybe a slight headache? Something not quite right up in the dome? Well, you could be dehydrated. That's probably it. Did you drink any water today? You know I told you you should drink more water! Are you getting enough sleep? Sometimes when I can't sleep… » 3/05/14 5:30pm 3/05/14 5:30pm

This Brilliant 12-Year-Old Mexican Girl Is Touted as 'Next Steve Jobs'

Meet 12-year-old Paloma Noyola Bueno. She goes to José Urbina López Primary School in Matamoros, Mexico. She's being touted as "the face of Mexico's unleashed potential." Mentioning Steve Jobs in the headline is purposely attention-grabbing — on Wired's part and on mine — but the gist of it is this: Our current idea… » 10/24/13 3:10pm 10/24/13 3:10pm

Being on a Diet Might Make You Shittier at Everything

Okay, so, it's sort of a no-brainer that super-severe calorie restriction (i.e. being really, really hungry all the time) can do a number on your ability to focus on everyday tasks—because, you know, your brain needs calories to function just like the rest of your body. But one new study suggests that even… » 9/27/13 6:15pm 9/27/13 6:15pm

Science Finds Fountain of Youth Brain Region That Slows Down Aging

Eternal or even elongated life is an idiotic thing to wish for. You don't want to get old, and then tack on 50 more years of wrinkles and Metamucil. But prolonged youth? Full body youth? More time being young and nubile and beautiful? Absolutely. And the key to that could lie right inside your brain. » 5/02/13 12:40pm 5/02/13 12:40pm

Teen Activist Shot By Taliban Will Get a Titanium Plate in Her Skull

Malala Yousafzai, the teenage girl who was shot in the head by a Taliban extremist for the outrageous crime of wanting to go to school (while female!), has just two more surgeries to go—one to install a cochlear implant and the other to patch her vulnerable damaged skull with a titanium plate. » 1/31/13 4:00pm 1/31/13 4:00pm

Depressed? Try Drinking Less Soda and More Coffee (Or, You Know,…

New research suggests that high consumption of soda and juice correlates with an increased risk of depression among adults—and those who drank diet versions of the same beverages were even more depressed. Adults who consume large amounts of coffee, however, are at a slightly decreased risk. Isn't that just sodapressing » 1/09/13 7:10pm 1/09/13 7:10pm

Your Aging Brain Will Make You Into a Total Sucker

You know how old people are forever getting scammed by totally obvious grifters? Sinking their life savings into pyramid schemes selling Canadian yarn art ("It sells itself"), or putting all their gold in a bag and mailing it to Glenn Beck? Well, it's not because the elderly are a buncha rubes, or that they know less… » 12/04/12 1:40pm 12/04/12 1:40pm

Congrats, Men: You Are Slightly Better at Remembering Where You Parked…

When it comes to spatial memory—the part of one's memory responsible for navigation—there appears to be an inherent difference between the sexes. According to a study published in the journal Applied Cognitive Psychology, men and women use different methods for remembering where one object is in relation to… » 11/26/12 12:35pm 11/26/12 12:35pm

Sons Are Leaving Fetal Cells All Up in Their Moms’ Brains, Which May Be…

Children are soooo selfish, aren't they just? They're always leaving shit behind for parents to clean up, shit like gross underwear, dead childhood pets, erotica so well-hidden that they forgot all about it when they moved out, and, according to the latest and greatest scientific research, fetal cells that they… » 9/27/12 10:00am 9/27/12 10:00am

People Who 'Age Gracefully' Actually Have Gigantic Super-Brains

Getting older is pretty much the scariest thing. We gain weight, our skin sags, our bones hurt, and our brains get weird. It's totally dumb! I am against it! That's why there are a million billion products (I counted) dedicated to preserving youth, and people do crazy shit like rub butterfly placenta on their faces… » 8/17/12 3:20pm 8/17/12 3:20pm

All that Stress Could Be Rapidly Eroding Ladies’ Lady-Brains

The female brain, according to some recent scientific gleanings, might be so overloaded with stress that it actually ages faster than the male brain, but don't stress about that because, first of all, nobody really knows for sure yet if this is true, and, second of all, stress is a rapacious zombie that may right this… » 7/30/12 9:15pm 7/30/12 9:15pm

Nestle Invests in Magical Anti-Dementia Milkshake

Uuuuuuugh, milkshake—you cruel vixen. Milkshakes are simultaneously the food I most desire and the food I can least justify eating. Essentially a method of injecting massive amounts of melted ice cream into one's bloodstream the shortest time possible (YESSS), milkshakes are obv terrible for your body. But it turns… » 7/20/12 10:00am 7/20/12 10:00am

Harvard Freezer Malfunction Destroys Dozens of Brains, Sets Back Autism…

As advanced as we've gotten with our scientific and technological skills, it seems as we can still be brought down by the simplest of errors. That's what happened recently at the Harvard Brain Tissue Resource Center, where they experienced a freezer malfunction that has defrosted 150 brains. » 6/11/12 8:45pm 6/11/12 8:45pm

Pro-Choice People Dream of a World Where All Babies Are Aborted, Says…

Just as zombies crave the delicious chewy flesh of the human brain, so too do pro-abortion rights people crave nothing more than to abort the shit out of every pregnancy. We're like hormonal teenagers. We'll abort anything that walks. All day we dream about abortion. At least, according to Mississippi Governor and… » 4/25/12 3:40pm 4/25/12 3:40pm