That Time You Got Caught In a Lie
If you’re anything like me, you’ll tell a lie before you even realize you’ve told it. But what happens when they asks to see the receipts? Uh oh—ya burnt!
New Weight Watchers Campaign Suggests Fat Women Don't Enjoy Sex As Much As Thin Women
Weight Watchers new WW Black campaign rolled out in Australia with a gift to reporters: a “mood light” lightbulb that you screw in before you screw. The marketing ploy is being criticized for its accompanying ad copy, not because no one would ever stop to change their lightbulb before getting it on.
Do These Abs Look Like Challah?
Alexander Skarsård, a man, is starring in the title role of a new Tarzan remake coming this summer. To prepare, he beat his abs in a bowl of hot water with yeast, four eggs, sugar, and salt, then added flour, then kneaded, then mixed ‘em up with a dough hook, then put that on a floured surface and kneaded more, then…
My Maternity Clothes Struggle
On an extremely rainy night this past autumn, I stood under an umbrella, looking up at the generic chain stores of NYC’s 34th Street. New Yorkers know that you don’t go to 34th Street for shopping unless you’re a tourist; this mall-like thoroughfare exists to enable our passage elsewhere, period. But on this…
Fox News Invites 'Panel of Fathers' to Discuss the Merits of Leggings
Would you let your daughter wear leggings out? I wouldn’t, but that’s because I don’t let my daughter leave her coat closet.
Kitchens Were Designed For Made-Up Women's Bodies
There was a time when kitchens were designed for the individual women who would spend their days in them—counter tops and sinks were measured to be ergonomically kind to their users, to facilitate easy use and minimize strain.
Nightmare: Woman's Body Stolen From Coffin Hours After Funeral
A funeral was held for Julie Mott, who died at age 25 of cystic fibrosis, on August 15 at Mission Park Funeral Chapels North in San Antonio, Texas. Just hours after the service concluded, Mott’s body disappeared. Police believe the body was stolen.
The Ultimate Laugh
When I came back to school at 29, after spending most of my twenties as a civilian, one thing I noticed was that it’s fun to laugh there. It’s fun to laugh in a classroom setting.
What I Learned When I Tried to Draw Myself Naked
You have no idea how many times I have tried to draw myself naked.
One Leg At a Time
I have a mantra when I get dressed in the morning; it starts when I pick up my socks: "May this be the hardest part of my day. May this be the hardest part of my day. May this be the hardest part of my day…" Sometimes it is, usually it's not. How often do you think about it, putting on socks? As someone with a…
The Way We Were 2, starring Kourtney Kardashian and Kim Kardashian.
OMFG Teach Your Kids Accurate Names for Body Parts Already
Generally speaking, girls have vaginas. Boys have penises. I did not think this was a groundbreaking thing to teach a 4-year-old (even at 2), but it is according to her teacher, who informed me my kid was telling other kids that babies come out of vaginas. First, I was so proud. Then I realized she was asking me to…
Your Boobs Are Poised for a Major Breakthrough
Boobs: What is there to say about them that hasn't been said? Turns out, quite a lot — from women. And if us gals have our way about the girls, we will be monopolizing the conversation about our boobs from here to eternity, which is kind of nice, seeing as how we've had so little say in their presentation up to now.
Depressing Study: Men Look More At Your Body Than Your Face
"I'm not a boob man or a butt man or a leg man, I'm a face man," say LIARS. According to new research, no matter what a woman's build, men spend more time looking at women's bodies than they do their faces, which means that we can stop with this "anti aging" bullshit and just let our mugs turn into the face of the…
We're Living in the Era of Body-Positive Wolf-Crying Run Amok
On the Emmy Awards red carpet on Sunday night, Lena Dunham wore a teal floral-print Prada gown and Claire Danes showed up in Armani. One's sartorial choice was panned, the other's lauded. Challenge: write about either woman's appearance without inducing knee jerk accusations of bodysnarking/thin shaming. YOU CAN'T DO…
Your Next Boyfriend: The Guy Who Gets Turned On By Farts
Conventional wisdom (or, as the Internet Kids call it, Rule 34) suggests that for everything innocent and nonsexual that exists, there is a porn version of that thing. Everything. The Flintstones, Teletubbies, Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman. Everything. I'd like to suggest a corollary to that rule: everything that exists…
Here's What Barbie Would Look Like if She Had Average Measurements
Artist Nickolay Lamm — he of the future fish faced humas and fresh-faced, scary-ass Barbie — got the measurements of an average 19-year-old from the CDC (Center for Disease Control & Prevention) and then made a 3D model and used photoshop to shape her into Barbie's blond as hell image. The result? Skipper on steroids…
What's Your Body Type: Cocktail Ring Or Lipstick?
Have you ever wondered piece of which chick lit clip art best describes your body? Today's Today featured a segment with "world-renowned style expert" Jacqui Stafford, who has come up with a set of new body type descriptors—and rules for how to dress them to make them less hideous—that are very girlie and…
Your Worst Flying Fears Are True: TSA Agents Are Making Fun of Your Naked Body
Well, maybe it's not your worst flying fear — that probably involves a plane full of babies and fire balls — but it's pretty damn awful. And infuriating. And dehumanizing. I could go on but instead, I'll let an allegedly former TSA agent do it for me.
Pretty Cool: Seeing Body Diversity Makes Us More Comfortable With Diverse Bodies
You know how all day, every day we're inundated with images of women with similar body types (thin) and told, "THIS IS PERFECT BE THIS SIZE OR DIE OF A FAT FAT ATTACK." Or, you know, just be thin so clothes will fit right, other people will find you suitable for fucking, and you won't die alone with your rotting…
