Can We Stop Fighting Over Beyoncé's Feminism Now?

Who's a feminist? NOT Beyoncé! Wait, no — yes, she is! (Now let the rotten tomatoes go flying.) This is a pretty accurate account of the feminist police arguing whether, following the release of Beyoncé's self-titled album last Friday, one even should call the superstar a feminist. Because apparently feminism is a very… » 12/17/13 5:10pm 12/17/13 5:10pm

The New Beyoncé Album Just Got All These People Pregnant

Somewhere between the pussy-eating sex jam "Blow" and feminist author Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie's cameo on Flawless, I thought to myself, "Holy shit, this new Beyoncé album is getting me pregnant." I took to Twitter to express this, only to discover that the new Beyoncé album is apparently getting a lot of people pregnant. » 12/13/13 4:20pm 12/13/13 4:20pm

Justin Bieber Made His Bodyguards Carry Him Up the Great Wall of China

Gleeful elf king of Little Shit Kingdom Justin Bieber has just out-Biebered himself: the most devious imp to ever don a flat-rimmed baseball cap made his bodyguards carry him up the Great Wall of China. As an uncouth, wild-eyed barbarian who has been known to urinate upon images of other nation's former leaders, Justin … » 10/01/13 9:09am 10/01/13 9:09am

Today in Do Not Want: Pix of Justin Bieber Naked With a Guitar

While the last bastion between us and Justin Bieber's ass has been little more than thin cotton boxers for awhile now, it's all over. I have seen Culo del Beebo, and so will you. These photos were taken at Thanksgiving at his grandma's house in Toronto, where he serenaded her, naked, with an acoustic guitar. Because… » 8/12/13 9:00am 8/12/13 9:00am

Nigella Lawson Walks Out On Alleged Domestic Abuser Charles Saatchi

The appearance of moving men taking boxes out of the home where Charles Saatchi and Nigella Lawson share with their kids — about two weeks after photos of Saatchi choking Lawson in a restaurant were printed in the Evening Standard — may signify that the TV chef's ten-year marriage to 70-year-old Saatchi has come to an… » 6/28/13 9:00am 6/28/13 9:00am

Beyonce Ate a Tuna, So Let's All Speculate About Her Barren Womb!

I mean, I like Blue Ivy and everything—she's super welcome at my birthday karaoke—but I seriously do not get the appeal of obsessive celebrity womb-sleuthing. Like, you guys, Beyonce either has another adorable mini-muffin Easy-Baking in her diamond-encrusted Jacob the Jeweler mommy-oven, or she doesn't. And either… » 5/22/13 8:00pm 5/22/13 8:00pm

Jay-Z Says Beyoncé Is Not Pregnant, Calls Rumors 'Worse Than Blogs'

The world rejoiced last week when, for a moment, rumors and reality became one and it was revealed that Blue Ivy would have a new sibling, one Red Vine. But with the light of a new week growing strong, dreams have been crushed and we'll just have to drown our sorrows in a bunch of lemon drops or something because… » 5/20/13 1:30pm 5/20/13 1:30pm

Beyoncé's Pregnant: The Five Things You'll Hear for the Next 9 Months

The British have Kate Middleton, but across the pond, we've got Beyoncé. The Queen of America is with child, and it is time to succumb to the wildest rumors that will undoubtedly consume our thoughts until Bey's second baby is birthed. Did Beyoncé go to Cuba to become impregnated with Fidel Castro's child? Is this just… » 5/17/13 7:00pm 5/17/13 7:00pm

Jaden Smith, 15, Longs to Be Legally Freed From Coolest Parents Ever

Even when you have the most laissez-faire, No Curfew, "You're-Going-To-Drink-So-Drink-In-The-House-Here's-Some-Patron" liberal Hollywood parents ever, you still want to fly the parental coop. Case in point: For Jaden Smith's 15th birthday this July, he asked Will Smith and Jada Pinkett-Smith if they'd sign the papers to… » 5/14/13 9:00am 5/14/13 9:00am