My mother once very wisely said "The important thing new parents have to remember is that honestly, nobody cares. Maybe the grandparents. But other than that, people don't want to hear about it." And this is coming from a woman who had two children by choice and stayed home with us for years. My parents loved us very much, but fully recognized that nobody else outside of immediate family could really be expected to care. I wish more people could have this attitude today, so I wouldn't feel morally obligated to coo over babies I've never actually seen in real life.
When I update about my kid it is usually about something really weird or dippy he did, but that's fair because if I update about me it is usually about something really weird or dippy I did.
The only people who've dropped me are family, not friends. heh. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
You don't even have to block people on Facebook. If they bore or annoy you, you can just hide their updates. Blocking is for severed relationships and stalkers. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@fattylumpkin: On the right side of the news feed, if you mouse-over someone's update, it'll give you a "hide" option. If you click that, it'll hide all of that person's posts. If it's an application update, you'll get a drop-down when you click the "hide" button so you can hide just the application updates or everything that person posts. This feature makes Facebook usable for me ;) #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@deeemer: I knoooow. I love my niece, but my news feed was nothing but her Farmville updates for a couple of days there. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@JennaW: Eh, I defriend boring people. If they're going to have constant updates about things I'm REALLY not interested in (Jesus, Republicanism, Children, whatever) I see no point in keeping them around. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@femme-bot: Being boring is a serious offense! I like that FB has a non-nuclear option, though, since there are so many of these sites where you have to dump people to avoid them. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@BytheSea: I wish you could block the effing "What [classic car, Hollywood starlet, soda, random inane thing] are you?"
They're not as bad as they were 5 or so months ago--I guess the fad died, but they cluged up my news feed forever, and each one was made by a different developer, so you couldn't block them en masse. I ended up hiding status updates from repeat offenders. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@JennaW: but all of the applications are produced by different companies, or they have different titles, so whereas it is very straightforward to block updates from Farmville or Mafia Wars, it's harder to block all of the "What Disney Princess/classic cocktail/whatever are you?" type things because you can't block them all--you can block Disney Princess, but classic cocktail will still get through.
My Facebook friends with kids are generally pretty okay.
I think updating several times a day everyday is the really annoying thing. Very few people have that much to say about themselves.
A lot of these parents on Facebook things including STFU Parents just seem bitchy to me. For every reasonable "Post about something other than your kid" or "Don't post photos of your kid on a toilet!" there's something like "How dare you go to a concert mother of a 2 year old, its just desperate!" or "How dare you post that you're psyched about her baby shower, obviously you're a materialistic bitch!" #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
I have a fb friend who has a whole album of "preggo pics", including pics of the positive pregnancy test, which she posted the day she found out. She updates the album every week with pictures of her from the front, left side, and right side, complete with commentary about how her body is changing and how she is dealing with the nausea, etc. She found out that the baby is a girl and she has announced the name of the baby and now refers to it in status updates. Examples: "Oooh I love feeling (Baby's name) kicking. Her profile picture is the ultrasound of the baby. The baby is due in late March.
I think it is a bit much, but I'm nosy and if she is ok with posting that much in a semi public forum, then it doesn't really matter to me. I also hide her status updates, so I don't have to see them every time I log in. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@the dodo, the cuckoo, and the nene: Maybe she's trying to demystify pregnancy for her friends and family? I know that I always want to ask pregnant friends all sorts of weird questions. Putting it on Facebook seems like an easy way to deal with the questions all at once, rather than having to answer them again, and again, and again... #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@Dancingfrog: I understand why people do it, especially those that have friends/family all over the country. I'm just saying that I personally would feel uncomfortable posting that much info in full view of every person that I am "friends" with. I have other friends who didn't reveal that they were pregnant until after the baby arrived. People can do what they wish. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@the dodo, the cuckoo, and the nene: I can't get behind the posting positive test thing. A "friend" of mine did that, and all I could think of was, "you pissed on that and felt the need to show it to me?" #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@DinosaurDanceParty: That's an amusing story. I'm sure that happens to a lot of people. Facebook has definitely redefined what we consider friendship. I make full use of privacy settings-most of my pics/statuses can only be viewed by about 30 people. The rest, well, to be honest, I keep 'em around because I'm nosy and I am addicted to Facebook. #tips
@officedrone4: Yeah the "Yes" pregnancy stick was the weirdest,and it also happens to be the album cover...she posted 3 different photos of it from different angles too, which just seems unnecessary.
Sure, I'll put up pictures of the ultra sound, but I'll photoshop my head onto the fetus' head.
I'll continue photoshopping my own head onto my baby's head until s/he's at least two or three, or old enough to file a lawsuit. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@morninggloria: just please. PLEASE! dont' set up a facebook page for your little fetus. I keep receiving requests to "friend" a friends 7 year old. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@morninggloria: Damn, I wish I was still at work. A work friend of mine did almost exactly that for another friend. Except she 'shopped a baseball hat and a foam finger onto the fetus. It may be my favorite image EVER. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
When my cousin had a baby, I worried that her FB feed was going to be nonstop infant updates.
But then I realized how I would prefer that over her nonstop "I'm praying for the nation because Obama's president" updates, and began to hope for them instead. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@wtfox?!: I got a two-fer: constant Obama bashing acquaintance + taking pic of baby's blowout diaper. I defriended her which was before I knew about feed hiding. Sorry, but your baby's shit is not the first shit that was ever shat.
Wait, did they not address the parents who drink a bottle of wine, log on to Facebook, and comment on every single picture of their daughter with an unknown male? OH MY GOD, MOM, I MET HIM AT A BAR! I DON'T KNOW WHAT HE DOES FOR A LIVING OR WHETHER HE'S CLOSE TO HIS FAMILY!
@jigglyball: Yeah, in a way, parents with older children are worse. I love reading the stories on CollegeHumor and MyParentsJoinedFacebook and it shocks me because my mom has a Facebook, but she never does any of that shit. It's like she and my dad are the only parents these days with any understanding of the child/parent divide, and that the stuff that we post on Facebook is sometimes for friends and not really for them. Perhaps it's because my mom's a teacher, though, so she has some insight into young people's lives that a lot of other adults don't, I guess. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@jigglyball: This is why I refuse to friend anyone in my family outside of my generation. It kind of makes me the designated family Bitch, but it's a small price to pay. My mom already exercises enough control over my life, and I'm quite clear on my extended family's maddening religious views, thank you. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@jigglyball: Or what about the Dad that only plays the facebook games. If my boyfriend gets another invitation to "get (facebook) wasted" with my father, I think I might never convince him to go to my family's for the holidays. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@lalie (apologetic mess): Luckily, my mom doesn't think she can actually exert control over my life, and we have a good relationship (and she's not religious, thank heavens). But she does love drinking while Facebooking.
My stepmom the religious fundie, however, will never be friended. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
I try to include both kid- and non-kid updates, just as I have both kid- and non-kid activities in my life. I know people who only ever post about their kids, and others who only ever post about their work or their pets or whatever else it is that absorbs them--I know one person who does nothing but go to shows and talk incessantly about them--and really, it's what it's for. I suppose it does give you insight into each person's particular narcissism, if you're sufficiently evolved for that to amuse you.
That said, I've had to hide people who talk about nothing but their pregnancies, which is just too painful for me right now, and I try not to get into politics there because I have friends across the spectrum and don't like arguments in my happy place. But too much of anything has the capacity to annoy/bore me to tears. It's the nature of the beast. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
I had this whole debate with myself when I first read STFU Parents (which, btw is really funny [and i'm a parent]). I realized that my one 'friend' who updates me on every minute detail of her work socializing is just as boring as someone oversharing about their kid. And I have the power to block both of them. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
"Blah Blah" is asking everyone who comes into contact with "Trendy Baby Name" to make sure they are healthy and to wash their hands well before holding him! 'Cause nobody wants to see Mamma Bear come out... YIKES!!! And no kisses... sorry... I know he is irrisitable... but please try to contain yourselves!
THAT'S NOT HOW YOU SPELL IRRESISTIBLE. YOU WOULD THINK THE RED SPELLING LINE WOULD HAVE GIVEN IT AWAY. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@TheFormerJuneBronson:
"At the end of a game, this child's famous mother might have asked her baby to play one more time."
"Who is a dirty hand maiden."
"I'm sorry, that's incorrect."
"Well, that's the game I played with your mother last night, Trebek." #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
The most damning "type" on this list is # 3: The Cool Parent. They describe a parent who's still posting about concerts and parties and other non-parenty things in an effort to show that parenthood hasn't changed them. So apparently posting the same stuff you would have posted pre-baby is annoying, too. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@rodmanstreet: Yeah, that one was stupid. I am always appreciative to have non-kid-related posts from my parental-type friends. It lets me know what they're doing. I don't mind the occasional kid update, but really, I'm friend with you, not your kid, and that means I want to see your bitching about the asshole in front of you at the concert, because that's your experience. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@boxspelunker: hmmm, I interpreted it as being about the "just got back from the rock concert with baby!" types, who drag their toddler with them while doing everything they used to do. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@Anne: Oh, that kind of cool parent. They just make me angry. Honestly, half of them are so irresponsible I am amazed they don't leave the kid on top of the car when they drive away from their awesome parties. I am not a big "someone think of the children" person, but there are times when yeah, you gotta think of the children!
Babies do not belong at house parties. Nor at metal concerts. Nor at the hookah lounge. Seriously. Why would you bring them there? #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@boxspelunker: I'm not a parent but I used to live in Park Slope (heh) and honestly I don't think the kids know the difference at that age. I think parents should be doing the same things they did before (slightly modified), as long as the baby doesn't seem unhappy. What should the kid be doing instead? Looking at stuffed animals circling their head? #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@AmesAndAndel: Well, it's dangerously loud at metal concerts, secondhand smoke is not good for children, and house parties are full of drunk people who aren't going to be more careful because there's a baby around.
It's not bad because the baby might not share those tastes, it's bad because these things can harm your child. Developing ears, from what I understand, are a lot more sensitive, and overly loud noises can deafen or partially deafen a child. Secondhand smoke, well, we've all seen the PSAs, so I won't harp on that, and is there any house party in the US that doesn't involve either a fight, broken shit, people stampeding through the house, puking or really, really loud music?
The kid should be somewhere in which he or she is not in danger or being hurt. Within reason. I mean, obviously, there's risk in everything, but bringing your infant to a metal concert? That's just irresponsible. Parents are free to continue doing the things they did before, but they also need to use common sense. If that's looking at stuffed animals circling their head, then yes, that is what they should be doing.
@boxspelunker: I don't think children should go to heavy metal concerts or crazy insane house parties; I don't think most people who are at the age when they would have children go to these types of events either (unless you birth a baby while in high school...). Also, no house parties I go to consist of "fights, broken shit, people stampeding through the house, puking or really, really loud music," and smoking indoors is against the law (where I live). I think that bringing babies to coffee shops, certain concerts, most restaurants, and chill bars are fine. They are babies, I still say they won't know the difference, and as long as you're not disturbing other customers, who cares? I mean, what else are parents supposed to do? Spend all day staring at their kid staring at the stuffed animals?
@AmesAndAndel: I made no mention of coffee shops, restaurants or bars. I'm saying that if parents want to go to the places I listed, then they should find a babysitter or consider not going.
Lots of people have children while in their undergraduate careers, and I would say, at least where I am, that these activities are not uncommon pursuits of the 20-25 age range, and that part of being a parent is sacrifice. I have never suggested that parents shouldn't go out or "spend all day staring at their kid staring at the stuffed animals". I am suggesting that you think before dragging your infant along to various venues that may not be the most appropriate places for them.
@sybann: one of the best features of Facebook is the "hide" function you'll get if you roll over one of those Farmville updates. You'll never see one again. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@leftcoaster: see below - sometimes you CAN'T hide a contact/friend for many reasons. I try to just scroll quickly past and post those updates on what is MOST annoying about some people on FB - passive-aggresive R us. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@sybann: WORD. Oh noes! A sheep has wandered off your land and onto my live feed. And then I stabbed it to death with a knife I stole from someone else's MafiaWars app. Now let's all find our photo of the day! #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@sybann: You can choose to "Hide" certain apps, like Farmville, instead of hiding the contact.
When you click the little "Hide" dropdown, all you have to do is click "Hide Farmville" and you'll still get updates from that person! #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@sybann: you don't have to hide your friend entirely. you could just hide the Farmville application and then you will never see *those* posts, but you'll see all the others. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@sybann: The new hide function lets you hide Farmville itself, not the friend. Also works for Mafia Wars. I was in your same shoes (not wanting to hide a friend, but hating the Farmville) until someone steered me straight. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@PrettyB is like Whoa: @Runaddict: @boxspelunker: Damn what a servicey bunch you are - I am all over that! Did you know you can also reorder what shows on your page now - did THAT after the latest "update."
God I am tired of changes on web sites. JUST when I get used to something. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@sybann: I get all excited when I can say something vaguely useful. I've gotten so many useful tips from this site!
And no more Mafia/Vampire/Werewolf/Supernatural Thing Wars, How Gangsta is Your Name, What Disney Character Are You, Aquarium, Farmville, nothing! I just basically want pictures and status updates, and that's what I've got. It's one of the few features I really like about fb. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
I just wish I could wax poetic about how adorable my little-itty-bitty elbow is and how amazing it is that I can sing/dance along with Beyonce without needing to have progeny involved. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
@ImDatNinja (loves her Red Sox): btw I love kids I just wish some people didnt assume Im not enjoying life cause I dont have them to call my own. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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The only people who've dropped me are family, not friends. heh. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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They're not as bad as they were 5 or so months ago--I guess the fad died, but they cluged up my news feed forever, and each one was made by a different developer, so you couldn't block them en masse. I ended up hiding status updates from repeat offenders. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
11/18/09
#tips
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#tips
11/17/09
I think updating several times a day everyday is the really annoying thing. Very few people have that much to say about themselves.
A lot of these parents on Facebook things including STFU Parents just seem bitchy to me. For every reasonable "Post about something other than your kid" or "Don't post photos of your kid on a toilet!" there's something like "How dare you go to a concert mother of a 2 year old, its just desperate!" or "How dare you post that you're psyched about her baby shower, obviously you're a materialistic bitch!" #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
11/17/09
I think it is a bit much, but I'm nosy and if she is ok with posting that much in a semi public forum, then it doesn't really matter to me. I also hide her status updates, so I don't have to see them every time I log in. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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I'll continue photoshopping my own head onto my baby's head until s/he's at least two or three, or old enough to file a lawsuit. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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[manbabies.com] #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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But then I realized how I would prefer that over her nonstop "I'm praying for the nation because Obama's president" updates, and began to hope for them instead. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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Surely that's an archetype. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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My stepmom the religious fundie, however, will never be friended. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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That said, I've had to hide people who talk about nothing but their pregnancies, which is just too painful for me right now, and I try not to get into politics there because I have friends across the spectrum and don't like arguments in my happy place. But too much of anything has the capacity to annoy/bore me to tears. It's the nature of the beast. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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"Blah Blah" is asking everyone who comes into contact with "Trendy Baby Name" to make sure they are healthy and to wash their hands well before holding him! 'Cause nobody wants to see Mamma Bear come out... YIKES!!! And no kisses... sorry... I know he is irrisitable... but please try to contain yourselves!
THAT'S NOT HOW YOU SPELL IRRESISTIBLE. YOU WOULD THINK THE RED SPELLING LINE WOULD HAVE GIVEN IT AWAY. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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@TheFormerJuneBronson:
"At the end of a game, this child's famous mother might have asked her baby to play one more time."
"Who is a dirty hand maiden."
"I'm sorry, that's incorrect."
"Well, that's the game I played with your mother last night, Trebek." #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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Babies do not belong at house parties. Nor at metal concerts. Nor at the hookah lounge. Seriously. Why would you bring them there? #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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It's not bad because the baby might not share those tastes, it's bad because these things can harm your child. Developing ears, from what I understand, are a lot more sensitive, and overly loud noises can deafen or partially deafen a child. Secondhand smoke, well, we've all seen the PSAs, so I won't harp on that, and is there any house party in the US that doesn't involve either a fight, broken shit, people stampeding through the house, puking or really, really loud music?
The kid should be somewhere in which he or she is not in danger or being hurt. Within reason. I mean, obviously, there's risk in everything, but bringing your infant to a metal concert? That's just irresponsible. Parents are free to continue doing the things they did before, but they also need to use common sense. If that's looking at stuffed animals circling their head, then yes, that is what they should be doing.
#tips
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#tips
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Lots of people have children while in their undergraduate careers, and I would say, at least where I am, that these activities are not uncommon pursuits of the 20-25 age range, and that part of being a parent is sacrifice. I have never suggested that parents shouldn't go out or "spend all day staring at their kid staring at the stuffed animals". I am suggesting that you think before dragging your infant along to various venues that may not be the most appropriate places for them.
#tips
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When you click the little "Hide" dropdown, all you have to do is click "Hide Farmville" and you'll still get updates from that person! #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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God I am tired of changes on web sites. JUST when I get used to something. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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BTW: That friend posts her FV status updates OUTSIDE of the app. Damnit, I may have to block her. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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And no more Mafia/Vampire/Werewolf/Supernatural Thing Wars, How Gangsta is Your Name, What Disney Character Are You, Aquarium, Farmville, nothing! I just basically want pictures and status updates, and that's what I've got. It's one of the few features I really like about fb. #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...
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Honey, I have three kids and I assume that you enjoy life a hell of a lot more than I do! ;-) #facebooksfivemostannoyingparen...