Jezebel 
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New York, 10:51 PM
Sun Nov 22
20 posts in the last 24 hours
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10/30/09
The reverse was happening with our family. Fat is associated with wealth and health as it is with many poor countries. And this is nothing to celebrate because the same set of dehumanizing insults are recreated with a different group of people.
The problem is that fat people, fat lives, and fat bodies are also signifiers for poor lives and poor bodies. And if there is ever a thing that we fear it is poverty. Thus our obsession with fat and our need to clean this fat up is largely in part due to the fact that the american culture is sooooo keen on pretending that poverty is non-existent. That it is a problem apart from all of our other problems like sexism and racism, ableism and sizeism. And really if we could just give those poor people a make over then really, we'd never have to think about it ever again!
(I realize that a. not all fat people are poor, and that b. poverty is not the only factor at work in the fat lives. But really the point had to be made.) #antifathatecrimes
10/29/09
he ran away. I thought about chasing him all the way to his mother and kicking her in the face. It starts with the parents...kids that young don't have hate on their own. They truly don't. I pretty much RAISE my nephew, he's about 6 months old at the moment and as I bathe him and feed him and rock him to sleep...I whisper to him things like "love everyone. you're growing up with so much love and all I want for you is to spread that love around."
fear and self loathing and insecurity and plain old bitterness fuels these things. #antifathatecrimes
10/29/09
10/29/09
After a while, I got scared of him. He was about a foot taller than me and seemed crazy. When he elbowed me again, I hit his arm w/my umbrella. He hauled off and punched me several times. This continued until he got off of the bus.
As he left the crowded bus, he kept yelling at me. No one on the bus tried to help me at all. As he left, they LAUGHED.
Prejudice against fat people is the only acceptable prejudice left. If this man had used a racial/ethnic/religious/homophobic slur, someone would have said something.
Watching TV, you see comedians like Conan O'Brien, who I used to enjoy and respect, telling fat jokes every night. It makes the situation worse. #antifathatecrimes
10/29/09
10/29/09
However.
"Prejudice against fat people is the only acceptable prejudice left. "
Um, no.
Hopefully Kate will correct you on this.
Also, please see this part of the article, right above your comment
"They even get bonus points for not falling into the "it's the last acceptable prejudice!" trap (please see rule 11 if you were thinking of doing that in comments here), while making it clear that it very much is a widely acceptable prejudice, with real consequences for real people"
in case she doesn't have time. #antifathatecrimes
10/29/09
10/29/09
I certainly don't mean to hint that no one else faces prejudice or bigotry. I suppose I'm just more sensitive to the anti-fat stuff because I'm fat.
I certainly didn't mean to offend and I apologize for that part of my comment. #antifathatecrimes
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10/30/09
@MissTicklebritches: I am so sorry that happened to you. And thank-you for telling your story. Hopefully people look beyond the one cliched but understandable comment and instead read your story and remember it the next time they are eye-witnesses to violence - any violence. #antifathatecrimes
10/29/09
This whole story also made me remember that Dove ad a few years ago, where the one reporter from the Chicago Sun-Times said he only wanted to see thighs that fat fried and covered with bread crumbs, and there was all this hand-wringing about "promoting" fatness. There was an absolutely horrible episode of Bill Maher, and it drove me crazy that no one on the panel pointed out this was a totally non-reality-based inflation of beauty standards and health. I didn't know much about fat acceptance then, but it seemed so fucking obvious there was no way to know anything about the health of these women (who were definitely not obese, and some of them not even "plus-size, IIRC), and I'd bet some of them were healthier than some of the skinny Hollywood women who stay that way by subsisting on Red Bull and cocaine.*
*obviously some women are naturally skinny and healthy, but there are lots of people who look sick--ashen, dark circles, haggard, bleary gaze, but they're "healthy" because they're skinny. #antifathatecrimes
10/29/09
The thing is, she talks about dieting all the time. She talks about how she doesn't want to wear tight clothes on Halloween because she thinks she's too fat, and she's upset that she's gained back some weight since her wedding (you really can't tell, but I guess she can). None of us know how to deal with this. I want my friend to realize how beautiful she is and that she has a great body. What do I do? We try and tell her, but I don't think it sinks in. #antifathatecrimes
10/29/09
Overthrow patriarchal capitalism. Call me if you need a hand. #antifathatecrimes
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10/29/09
If a woman who has lets say 35% body fat and very very large breast, large hips and a proportionally small waist, they are treated with more respect.
Whereas, another woman with 35% body fat, who carries it around their middle, thighs, or butt, is not shown the same amount of respect.
This is something that people have no control over, but it affects how they are perceived, and in this case comes down to beauty standards.
The whole conversation is just frustrating, there's way too much vanity in our society. #antifathatecrimes
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10/29/09
A couple of months ago, a colleague of mine was eating a salad and asked me if I wanted to finish it for her. I don't know what insulted me more, the suggestion that I needed to eat the vegetables or the idea that I was going to eat her food. I was just floored that someone would even ask me that (especially since she saw me eating an hour before). I still wonder if she thought that I had so little self control that I was going to devour any food in my line of sight.
If someone did try to jump me or beat me, thinking that I was just a fat, weak, target, they'd have something coming to them. I work out daily and have some pretty decent muscle mass under my fat. #antifathatecrimes
10/29/09
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10/29/09
The level of verbal abuse heaped upon the overweight is mind boggling. #antifathatecrimes
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10/29/09
Some knob-end called me that the other day when I suggested that, as he was riding his bicycle on the pavement, not on the road, he was perhaps not a grown man but a little boy. #antifathatecrimes
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10/30/09
on the flip side, men call each other fat all the time, regardless of their age or whether they actually are overweight or not. #antifathatecrimes
10/29/09
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10/29/09
Still shitty behavior though. #antifathatecrimes
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10/30/09
the kicker is that dictator for life's fiance', plus or minus 90 pounds is still fundamentally the same guy on the inside. HE knows that, but because his outside has changed, he's trying to act like the 90 pounds heavier guy never existed, and that's a lie...and it's hard to not feel like your personality has to change because your outside has changed.
i hope he comes around. #antifathatecrimes
10/29/09
I probably feel worse because I know that I've put on a lot of weight in the time that I've known her. This just means that after she says this stuff I'm left wondering "Are you thinking this about me too?" #antifathatecrimes
10/29/09
And let's not get me started on the constant harping about how so-and-so is the 'biggest ever'. Nice...real nice.
Decency and politeness is out the window, I'm afraid. #antifathatecrimes
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10/29/09
I think now it's like, if you see a very overweight person, it's sort of expected that you'll turn to your friend and say something like, "Wow, ew," or "If I'm ever that fat, smother me to death." I've been guilty of saying those things - and I'm sorry. It really is insecurity, fear and worry. #antifathatecrimes