Samoyeds Are Good
In today’s Tweet Beat, I’m going to show you some Samoyeds. That’s it.
New York Will Get Paid Family Leave
New York City will be getting a minimum wage of $15, and the state will have paid family leave by the end of 2018 with a new budget agreement. Gov. Andrew Cuomo announced the approximately $150-billion budget on Thursday.
The NFL Will Exploit Your Dead Mom But Not Let You Celebrate Her
Pittsburgh Steelers running back DeAngelo Williams has an incredibly personal connection to the cause of breast cancer awareness. Four of his aunts died of breast cancer, and last year, so did his mother, Sandra Hill. Williams has dyed his hair pink, painted his toenails, and written about his family’s history of…
"I'm A Grown-Up Now": The Teen Who Accused Kevin Johnson Of Sexual Abuse Speaks Out
There is a photograph of a pile of pink and white paper hearts atop Mandi Koba’s Facebook page. She cut the hearts out of hard copies of a 1996 police report from Phoenix, Ariz. The cops, according to the vintage report used in the arts and crafts project, were investigating “a celebrity involved in a reported child…
Should You Fuck Tiger Woods?
There’s a report floating around that Lindsey Vonn broke up with Tiger Woods after she found out he was cheating on her with Amanda Boyd, Jason Dufner’s ex-wife. Regardless of the story’s veracity, it does lead to a basic question: Should people still fuck Tiger Woods?
An Ode to Sydney Leroux's Eyelashes
Everywhere I go, people are talking trash about Sydney Leroux’s fake eyelashes. To be fair, I’ve been in Canada, where she’s particularly reviled. I get it, she turned her back on you, Canada. You’re hurt. But through the pain, I beg you, do not bring her eyelashes into this. Because let’s be real: those eyelashes are…
Hope Solo's Redemption Tour Has Begun
The Women’s World Cup starts June 6, and, right on time, frequently-arrested USWNT keeper Hope Solo’s reclamation project is starting up, too. If you’re wondering why this campaign is happening, we have no answers for you; all we can do is point you to the first stop, a long, gushy, and somewhat confused ESPN profile.
Darren Sharper's "Penis Monitoring" Is Evil, Retrograde Bullshit
A casual observer might take note of Darren Sharper's pending plea agreement in rape charges spread across at least four years and four different states for any number of the obvious reasons—this is, after all, a case involving a former NFL All-Pro being revealed as a serial rapist. One of those reasons, though, would…
Hey, Here's A Photo Of Tiger Woods Without His Fake Front Tooth (Yes)
Go with me on this for a second. If you were gonna fly all the way out to Italy to surprise your girlfriend at her job—she's up for a record! this is important to her!—and go through the trouble of letting her family know ahead of time, and having them keep it a secret, you'd probably take a second or two to freshen…
Ray Rice Wins Appeal, Eligible To Play Immediately [UPDATE]
Ray Rice will be reinstated to the NFL, according to NFL.com's Ian Rapaport:
Jameis Winston To Sit One Half For Yelling "Fuck Her Right In The Pussy"
Florida State quarterback Jameis Winston will sit out the first half of the Seminoles' game against Clemson Saturday as punishment for yelling "Fuck her right in the pussy" on a table in the middle of campus Tuesday.
Hazing Investigation: Ohio State Band Members Are Horny And Depraved
The Ohio State University marching band is in some shit after an investigation revealed the band to be more or less Porky's with tubas and kettle drums. A report stemming from the university's two-month investigation has quite a few details on the internal goings-on of the Best Damn Band in the Land, including the…
Did China's one-child policy actually reduce population growth?
China made huge headlines late last month when it decided to ease its famous "one-child policy" after more than three decades. The policy, requring most couples to have only one child, stands as one of the most famous social experiments of the past century. But how successful was it?
Get Ready For Some Ultra-Crappy Olympic Figure Skating Coverage
If you were hoping against hope that you'd be able to enjoy the Sochi Winter Olympics this February, despite all the Russian anti-gay fuckery, because cuddling up with your couch blanket and mug of spiked apple cider for days and days of prime-time coverage of figure skating is your idea of a little slice of glitter…
Delta Bumps Entire Flight For Florida Basketball Team
About 50 passengers were told that their fully booked flight had been canceled because of a mechanical problem. That's when they noticed the Gators basketball team boarding.
Boom: Four Steubenville School Officials Indicted in Teen Rape Case
This morning, Ohio's Republican Attorney General Mike DeWine announced the findings of a grand jury investigation into the roles Steubenville school officials played in covering up the town's now-infamous sexual assault of a girl by football players a year ago in August. Among those charged? The school's…
Sasha Obama Causes Nationwide Unicorn Sweater Shortage
On Sunday, Sasha Obama wore a sweater with a unicorn on it to a basketball game. By Thursday, unicorn sweaters had gone extinct. (Is "extinct" the word for a sweater selling out? Maybe it should be.)
Albuquerque Voters Say 'Hell No' To Abortion Ban
Yesterday, a proposed ban on abortions after 20 weeks of pregnancy was rejected by voters of Albuquerque. We're not talking a polite "it's not you, it's me" kind of rejection. We're talking changing your phone number-level rejection. We're talking Moving To Another City Without Telling You kind of rejection. Here's…
Jackie O's Pink Suit Will Remain Hidden Away Until We're All Dead
Fifty years ago this week, President John F. Kennedy was assassinated in Dallas, Texas as he rode in a motorcade alongside his wife Jacqueline. The now-iconic blood-spattered pink suit that the First Lady wore that day hasn't been seen in public since, but not because it's missing; it's because it's locked in a vault…
Cofounder of Pinkberry Turns Out to Be a Bad, Violent Person
In case you missed it: this weekend, Young Lee, a cofounder of Pinkberry, was convicted of beating a homeless man in 2011. When even yogurt millionaires turn out to be bad people, who are we as ladies supposed to trust? Et tu, Yoplait?
