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Why the Hell Are We Still Holding First Lady Bake-Offs? Stop It. Stop It Right Now.

Yesterday, Family Circle announced that First Lady and Princeton-educated attorney Michelle Obama's white and dark chip cookie recipe roundly defeated challenger and stay-at-home mom Ann Romney's M&M's cookie recipe. And while it's tempting to joke about the metrics of stay-at-home mom success versus lawyer success,…

Rodeo Announcer Says Michelle Obama Belongs in National Geographic Magazine [Updated]

In a move that has brought shame upon the noble profession of rodeo announcing, a lone moe-ron at a small California rodeo has set back mainstream acceptance of airbrushed cowboy hats with hot pink feathered roach clips attached to them by decades. During a rootin', tootin' jamboree this weekend, the announcer made a…

Ann Romney Promises Mitt Will Love America Like a Smitten Teen at a High School Dance

In an attempt to appeal to female voters, last night the GOP showcased some of its best lady talent, all of whom had some harshly dismissive words about the War on Women (it's a figment of your hysterical imagination) and how Mitt Romney will do things that will make ladies happy. The most noteworthy, touching moment…