Westminster Dog Retires to Breed. Why Can't Bitches Have It All?

Miss P is a four-year-old beagle from British Colombia—a fully grown adult, by dog standards. On Tuesday, she won the top honor in her field, the Westminster Dog Award for Best in Show. A legacy attendee—her granduncle, Uno, won the prize in 2005—Miss P was considered an outlier nonetheless, and statistically speaking… » 2/18/15 3:15pm 2/18/15 3:15pm

What The Animal Kingdom Really Thinks About Women's Makeup

It's a well-known secret that men hate it when we wear makeup and/or outwardly express our personalities. It's documented here, here and here. Have you ever considered the equally relevant opinion of barn animals? Animals of the wild? Household pets? We asked around and found out what they really think about your… » 2/05/15 5:20pm 2/05/15 5:20pm

Jackrabbits Take Over North Dakota Development, Breed Uncontrollably

Some Jackrabbits finally decided to live up to their name and multiply all over one North Dakota Development. At first the jackrabbits were welcome. "Right away I thought they were real cute," said one resident. "And now they're becoming a big nuisance," she said of the 40 to 50 jackrabbits she sees running across her… » 2/03/15 10:10am 2/03/15 10:10am

Hey, Assholes: You Do Not Need an Exotic Animal at Your Wedding

Face-numbing, giddy breathlessness tends to be a key feature in the discovery of any wedding trend. The more expensive and bubbleheaded the supposed "craze," the more likely you'll find yourself in a state of paralysis, dazed by the stupidity of it all. I regret to inform you that today is no exception. » 12/22/14 2:32pm 12/22/14 2:32pm

BREAKING: Here's Uncensored Video of Seal-on-Penguin Copulation

Scientists have just returned from studying king penguins and they've learned quite a bit. In fact, they brought you a souvenir video. Please enjoy this lesson about the seals and the penguins. (And how incredibly cruel the animal kingdom can be and also feel inspired to do something different tomorrow; something that… » 11/17/14 9:00pm 11/17/14 9:00pm

When Owls Attack!: Watch The View's Nicolle Wallace Tuck and Roll

Nicolle Wallace, co-host of The View, earned her pay check on Friday when she rolled off a couch while interviewing an animal keeper and his stank-eyed owl. Her self-admitted fear of birds overruled her common sense and she screamed after the bird was gone. It was the most interesting moment on the morning show in… » 11/14/14 1:10pm 11/14/14 1:10pm

Golden Retriever Loves Watching Football SO FUCKING MUCH OH MY GOD

This golden retriever, much like your cousin Chad, cannot even fucking cope with his excitement about football season. He loves it so much, in fact, that some Septembers he will hop back and forth laterally for NEARLY TWO POINT FIVE MINUTES STRAIGHT. (Much like your cousin Chad.) And that is just the hopping we know… » 9/05/14 4:50pm 9/05/14 4:50pm

Animal Planet Is Giving a Whole New Meaning to 'Labor Day'

If you have nothing to do over Labor Day, why not turn on your computer and spend it watching THE MIRACLE OF LIFE? All holiday weekend, Animal Planet will be showing a live feed on its website of various species giving birth and spoiler alert: it will be intense, slimy and have a damn cute ending. » 8/25/14 7:45pm 8/25/14 7:45pm