Alicia Keys Is Into Aliens Who Have the Right Vibe

"I’ve met some serious aliens in my life… I’m sure you’ve seen a UFO. Haven’t all of us seen something flying in the sky [at some random time of night] and it’s not the shape of a plane? …I don’t know if I’d go with an alien to space. I would have to feel the alien’s vibe. I’m a vibe person." » 10/07/13 1:10pm 10/07/13 1:10pm

Suri Cruise's Clothing Line Is Our Fearsome New Reality

Now that Katie Holmes and Suri Cruise have been away from the Xenu madness and securely ensconced in the filthy bosom of Manhattan for some time, the 7-year-old child can go about having a totally normal childhood. Which now involves ghost-designing a fashion line that's worth more than Reese Witherspoon's new property » 5/11/13 11:30am 5/11/13 11:30am

Prince Michael Jackson, 16, Has a Job in Showbiz

A poised and hella grown-uppish Prince Michael Jackson has landed a job as a special correspondent for Entertainment Tonight, a pretty impressive gig for a 16-year-old although though my impulse is to yell at him to stay the fuck away from show business and go work at the Dairy Queen like a normal teenager because I… » 2/19/13 9:00am 2/19/13 9:00am

The Wonderful, Wild and Vile Fashions of the Grammy Awards

Despite the fact that CBS issued a memo warning not to show off breasts, buttocks, or any "puffy" bare skin, celebrities attending the 55th annual Grammy Awards last night embraced sheer fabrics, exposed breast curvature and even displayed nipples. That said, it wasn't a very exciting night for fashion; there were… » 2/11/13 11:20am 2/11/13 11:20am

This Black History Month, Listen to Maya Angelou Teach Professional…

It's hard to start the weekend off on a snarky note, especially when Maya Angelou started off her third annual Black History Month program on public radio with such sincerity by teaching professional singer Alicia Keys how to sing, thereby proving that none of us should ever stop learning. The AP explained that… » 2/02/13 5:00pm 2/02/13 5:00pm

The Kardashian Christmas Card Looks Like a Tampon Ad

I think it was Tolstoy who wrote, "Happy families are all alike, but Kardashians are all different kinds of bacterial strains of fame-grubber." Here is their Christmas card, which features dearly departed Persian kitten Mercy (RIP) sitting unhappily in something that looks like it came from Ikea and is maybe called a… » 12/18/12 9:00am 12/18/12 9:00am

Pizza Hut Hawks Unholy Pizza-Scented Fragrance

Pizza Hut is releasing a perfume. Seriously. But if it seems like a joke, it's because that's how this all started. In an effort to get people talking about the pizza chain, an advertising agency that works with its Canadian branch posted on Facebook, "Do you love the smell of a box of Pizza Hut pizza being opened? We… » 12/05/12 4:40pm 12/05/12 4:40pm

The Kurt and Courtney Musical Will Either Be Awesome or a Total Disaster

During the Lufti/Spears trial, Sam Lufti let this slip: "[Courtney Love and I] are currently working on a possible motion picture or Broadway musical based on the Nirvana catalogue, based on her life and Kurt Cobain's." However, because Lufti is skeezier than the stuff that falls between the wall and your bed and… » 10/25/12 9:00am 10/25/12 9:00am

Alicia Keys Still Flammable in "Girl On Fire" Video

The music video for Alicia Keys' "Girl On Fire" premiered on VEVO yesterday, and no, it's not based on The Hunger Games (although if it were in the end credits of Catching Fire, nobody'd complain). The video, which portrays Keys as a working mom with a magic touch, features lots of jewel tones and one hella cool … » 10/20/12 4:40pm 10/20/12 4:40pm

Unfortunately, Alicia Keys' New Album Title Wasn't Inspired By The…

As many current R&B mainstays are wont to do at this point, Alicia Keys dropped Frank Ocean's name as a major inspiration for her upcoming fifth studio album, Girl On Fire, in a discussion with The New York Times. More importantly (to us, anyway), the title, unfortunately, wasn't drawn from The Hunger Games » 9/29/12 12:30pm 9/29/12 12:30pm

The Good, the Bad and the Very Ugly Clothes of the MTV Awards

Last night the MTV Video Music Awards were held in Los Angeles, and started early. Apparently this was necessary because the President was speaking and it was also Fashion's Night Out. But it resulted in a fashion photo disaster: Celebrities were all dressed up in the middle of the goddamn afternoon, under the harsh… » 9/07/12 11:40am 9/07/12 11:40am

Rihanna Goes Out Partying For A Change, Smashes Glass Table

Rihanna, God of Patron Shots and Cigarette Butts and Hangovers and General Chaos, almost got thrown out of a London nightclub after she supposedly jumped on a glass table, fell, smashed it and then started screaming "Don't you know who I am?" when the doorman started kicking her out (which undoubtedly sounds less dick… » 9/01/12 11:30am 9/01/12 11:30am

Katie Couric's New Theme Song by Sheryl Crow Sounds Exactly Like You…

The Katie Couric talk show we've all been waiting for, all our lives, forever, has debuted its new theme song, written and performed by none other than Couric's friend Sheryl Crow. The Grammy winner talked about what went into penning the theme song for Katie: » 7/27/12 9:00am 7/27/12 9:00am

In what could only be called Nancy Drew and the…