New Condom Ad Warns Would-Be Dads About Nut-Punching Toddlers

Adweek has (rightly) praised this spec ad written for Durex, a cautionary, slow-mo montage of fathers having their testicles smashed by careless toddlers set to the Moonlight Sonata. All of this nut violence could have been avoided if these dudes just practiced safe sex and avoided procreation. Humanity has had a good … » 8/04/13 12:00pm 8/04/13 12:00pm

Hotel Ad Promises Guests Piles of Snuggling Bunnies in Every Room

This is a commercial for...a hotel? I think? Bah, who even cares? Look at all the bunnies cuddling and sniffing the air warily, as if some voracious predator is going to leap out from under the covers and throttle them all to death. Stupid, adorable bunnies! Adweek speculates that the commercial maestros behind this… » 6/06/13 8:35pm 6/06/13 8:35pm

NuvaBling Will Turn Your Lady Parts into a Diamond Mine Shaft, Like…

Holy shit were there a whole lot of special guests who turned up for Justin Timberlake's fifth hosting gig. Special guests like two wild and crazy guys named Steve Martin and Dan Aykroyd, or America's favorite human man, Tom Hanks. Murphy Brown was there, too, making this episode of SNL so star-studded that only a… » 3/10/13 11:30am 3/10/13 11:30am

Most Graphic Condom Ad Ever Features Fake Bukkake, For Some Reason

There are a myriad of good reasons to use condoms — preventing the spread STD's, staving off pregnancy... erm, the smell of rubber and lube gets you hot. But using condoms primarily as a way to prevent explosive ejaculations of sex-juice from landing on a partner's face during climax? According to this totally gross… » 9/12/12 5:30pm 9/12/12 5:30pm

Magic 'Husband-Finding' Metal-Shard Sweater Probably Won’t Help You Find …

Are you in the market for a husband, preferably one that is easily dazzled by shiny bits of metal/plastic? Are you also cold? If you answered, "Goddamn fucking right I am" to either of these questions, then you're in luck because there's still time to start a bidding war on a "Magic, Beaded, Husband-finding*, Sparkly… » 9/04/12 11:50am 9/04/12 11:50am

Senate Candidate Drowning in Campaign Money Buys Her Very Own TV…

Campaign ads are one of the worst parts of any election cycle, and the idea of having to watch them 24/7 sounds, frankly, like torture. That is why it seems very curious that Linda Lingle, a candidate for the U.S. Senate in Hawaii, has taken the unprecedented step of creating her own television channel to broadcast her … » 6/18/12 10:00am 6/18/12 10:00am

Watch Zooey Deschanel's Hilarious Brother Jooey Push All of Siri's…

If you think Siri gets bitchy when you ask her about Zooey Deschanel, wait until you see what she does when confronted with Jooey Deschanel. He's Zooey's "brother," and he seems to be suffering from some kind of adorkable spectrum disorder that allows him to drive Siri over the brink. "Siri, you wanna take a soup bath?" » 5/17/12 11:15pm 5/17/12 11:15pm

Cute Ad Encourages You to Keep Your Pet from Turning Into a Teen Mom

Your puppy or kitten might look all sweet and innocent now, but they can turn into a slutty pooch or caddy cat before you're even expecting it. As this ad shows, once you start thinking of your adorable little animals as horny teens, it changes everything and suddenly you'll want to do anything to keep them from… » 5/15/12 11:15pm 5/15/12 11:15pm

Make Your Eyes Look Delicious With Burger King Eye Makeup

This is an actual ad for Burger King from the Netherlands, and it's a game changer. What better way could there be to get people to notice you than by turning your face into an ad for fast food? Try using "Would you like fries with that?" as your signature pick-up line, and you'll have suitors trying to bite your eyes… » 3/30/12 10:20am 3/30/12 10:20am

Hank, the Cat Who's Running for Senate, Has Made Some Powerful Enemies


Things are getting ugly in the race for Senate in Virginia. Some mysterious organization has launched a vicious attack ad against Hank, the cat who's entered into the race. And they're not afraid to get personal. For instance, they take him to task for never releasing his birth certificate or tax returns, and then… » 3/01/12 11:15pm 3/01/12 11:15pm

Beware the Danger of the Super Bowl Bladder Infection


There's so much excitement during the Super Bowl that it can be easy to get caught up in all the hoopla and... forget to attend to basic bodily functions? Most people are usually more concerned with consuming as many nachos as possible than they are about whether they're breathing or have to go potty, but according to … » 1/31/12 9:05pm 1/31/12 9:05pm

Ferris Bueller Is Back and Has Something to Sell Us


Whoa. Blast from the past. Ferris Bueller is back from wherever movie characters live once the movie is over, and he's got something he wants us to buy. This mysterious ten-second teaser for a Super Bowl ad has just surfaced, showing Matthew Broderick playing a 40-something Ferris—a sight which is as unnerving as it… » 1/27/12 10:00am 1/27/12 10:00am

In Insane New Ad, Gym Likens Itself to Auschwitz Because It's 'A Calorie …


Just when you thought every single person in the world had learned the lesson that it is never, never, never a good idea to make light of the holocaust, this comes along: A gym called the Circuit Factory in Dubai put out an ad several days ago that features a picture of the Auschwitz concentration camp with the… » 1/08/12 5:10pm 1/08/12 5:10pm

Does Michele Bachmann's New Ad Reveal That She's Actually A Terminator?


Iowa's endlessly-discussed caucus is tomorrow, and as part of Michele Bachmann's extremely uphill battle to win it, she's airing a brand new ad on local TV. The ad, which is only 30 seconds long, at first appears to be just another standard-issue spot laced with half-truths and bland music. Then at the :04 mark, a… » 1/02/12 2:00pm 1/02/12 2:00pm