Amazon Might Buy Net-A-Porter

Net-a-porter, the online designer fashion mecca, is in talks to be bought by retail giant Amazon for the cool sum of $2.19 billion, Women's Wear Daily reports. » 3/26/15 9:30pm Thursday 9:30pm

Amazon Doesn't Like Bigfoot Porn as Much as You Do

Monster porn: no longer getting people and their "rape fantasies" off—or making one writer up to $30,000 a month—on Amazon since 2015. » 3/24/15 12:00am 3/24/15 12:00am

Congratulations to Paula Deen on Her New Book Deal with Hachette!

Paula Deen, diabetic butter enthusiast and famed deployer of racial slurs (as she said in her deposition: "I can't, myself, determine what offends another person"), has just signed a multi-book deal with Hachette, the publisher relatively fresh off their frazzled, victorious campaign against Amazon to set their own… » 3/02/15 2:30pm 3/02/15 2:30pm

Good Luck Getting a Copy of Laura Ingalls Wilder's Pioneer Girl 

Never underestimate the enduring appeal of Little House on the Prairie. Pioneer Girl, a scholarly packaging of Laura Ingalls Wilder's long-unpublished original memoir, is currently one of the hottest titles on Amazon. » 1/30/15 6:20pm 1/30/15 6:20pm

The Always Up To Date Guide To Amazon Prime Benefits

Amazon has added so many benefits to Prime that they're starting to get hard to keep track of, so we're going to round them up for you, and update this post as new ones roll out. Sadly we can't list drone delivery as a perk just yet. » 1/23/15 3:00pm 1/23/15 3:00pm

Load Up on Cheap Kindle Books During This One-Day Sale

Whether you want to learn a new programming language, get lost in a space opera, or brush up on your WWII history, Amazon's got something for you today in a massive Kindle ebook sale. » 1/13/15 9:45am 1/13/15 9:45am

Here's What to Expect From That Woody Allen Series Coming to Amazon

Showbiz news! Legendary and incredibly predictable director Woody Allen has signed on with Amazon to produce a TV series. While we don't know who it will star or what it's called (for now, Untitled Woody Allen Project), there are a few things that we think might be in the pipeline. » 1/13/15 10:45am 1/13/15 10:45am

America Bought So Much Frozen Shit for Christmas, Including Duct Tape

In a development that shocks absolutely no one, Americans bought an absolute crapload of Frozen paraphernalia for Christmas, from Elsa dolls to branded duct tape. Yes, you read that right. Frozen-branded duct tape exists. » 12/26/14 4:10pm 12/26/14 4:10pm

Someone Wrote 'Erotica' About a Video Game Designer Getting Gang-Raped

A self-published erotica author who goes by Valeria O. has written a thinly-veiled work of fiction about Gamergate, in which a video game designer gets gang-raped by a group of men offended by her latest game. Holy shit, Valeria. Holy shit. » 12/19/14 1:00pm 12/19/14 1:00pm

Save 25% on Any Book Amazon Sells Today. Seriously, Any Book. 

Over Black Friday weekend, Amazon offered a 30% off coupon on any print book they sold, and a lot of you took advantage. If you missed out though, or you had a second book you wanted to grab, you have another chance today, though the discount is 25% this time ($10 maximum savings). » 12/12/14 9:15am 12/12/14 9:15am

Amazon Starts Black Friday a Week Early Like Maniacs

Amazon is aiming to stress everybody the absolute fuck out by starting its Black Friday sales an entire week before Black Friday. Beginning on November 21st, the largest internet company in America is counting down to Black Friday with a "Deals Week," proclaiming that: "It's never to early for a good deal." » 11/20/14 4:20pm 11/20/14 4:20pm

TV Land Dumps Reruns of The Cosby Show Over Alleged Rapes

TV Land won't be airing any more episodes of The Cosby Show following a recent resurgence in discussing the numerous rape allegations against Bill Cosby. Netflix and NBC have already dropped or stalled their business with him, so we all knew this was coming. It was only a matter of time. » 11/20/14 10:30am 11/20/14 10:30am

Target Frantically Debuts Free Shipping to Woo Holiday Shoppers

The holiday retail wars are upon us! Macy's kicked off the melee by announcing they'd open at 6 pm on Thanksgiving; now Target says free shipping will be available for every damn thing on their website until December 20. Go right ahead and order that sack of Dove chocolates for your honeybun's stocking. » 10/22/14 12:50pm 10/22/14 12:50pm

America Has Some Critical Questions About the Return of SURGE

Thanks to the endless wheedling of the Internet, SURGE, the disgusting beverage that fueled my high-school debate team's dumbest, most ridiculous antics, has been resurrected for sale exclusively on Amazon. And now a bunch of people are amusing themselves by posting absurd questions and even more ludicrous answers on… » 10/20/14 3:20pm 10/20/14 3:20pm

Here Are the Real and Ridiculous Reviews for Vaginal Shrinking Cream

If there's one thing that hasn't yet been advertised on late-night television, it's a cream that will shrink your vagina into a tiny nothing that not even an ant could get through. A cream that works miracles to turn even the biggest sleeve of wizard into an impenetrable fortress of solitude. Now that's changed. » 10/09/14 7:00pm 10/09/14 7:00pm

Urban Outfitters Lied About Being the World's Biggest Vinyl Dealer

Urban Outfitters — no longer content with appropriating tragedy, Native American culture or independent artists' work — has moved on to appropriate another corporation's rightful place as the world's leading retailer of vinyl. Is lying to Wall Street analysts supposed to be ironic? » 10/01/14 4:50pm 10/01/14 4:50pm

Burn Everything: Amazon Is Selling Sex Toys For Dogs

The first thing we need to get out of the way is that these toys are probably for human use. Now we can freak out about this giant tongue thing like the fucking Victorians that we are! » 7/15/14 8:30pm 7/15/14 8:30pm

Calling It: 2014 Is the Summer of Goats

The roiling hordes of Internet users demand cute—but they also demand novelty. With Grumpy Cat nearing 100% mindshare, cats are played out. Puppies are just so, so obvious. Sloths are weird. Bunnies are niche, their appeal limited to avant/fashion types. » 6/20/14 3:40pm 6/20/14 3:40pm