It was really just a matter of time before Rihanna's notorious Instagram account helped police solve an international crime, wasn't it? There's always so much going on in her pictures, from giant spliff-lighting to exotic-animal caressing — eventually, one of those Instagrams was going to reveal, Blow-Up-style, a dead body waaaaaay in the background, or, as was the case on Friday, a slow loris waaaaay in the foreground.
On Friday, during a break from her Diamond World Tour, Rihanna visited Thailand and posted a picture of a wide-eyed, adorable, and totally endangered slow loris perched on her shoulder, with the caption, "Look who was talkin dirty to me! #Thailand #nightlife" The internet got justifiably angry with the pop star, reminding her that slow lorises are a protected species and that posing for casual photos with the tiny primates only contributes to exotic animal trade. However, the picture went beyond aimless internet rage. After being alerted to Rihanna's slow loris selfie, authorities on the Thai island of Phuket arrested two men on charges of possession of protected animals. The men had two slow lorises with them, and could face up to four years in prison. #irresponsiblecelebrities [AP via Yahoo]
- Kris Jenner reportedly called an emergency Kardashian Family Summit. Or, she invited everyone over promising to order takeout, only to then second-guess herself, which led to the Great Kardashian Take-Out Debate, which I guess is sort of like a family summit, which I guess is important if you care what sort of bowel movements the Kardashians are sharing this morning. Pooping is natural, you guys, STOP BEING SUCH PRUDES, JEEZ. [Radar]
- Ken Jeong is apparently suffering from Changnesia, unable to remember whether he is actually a licensed physician in real life, or whether he will play one on his very own sitcom. [Deadline]
- Andy Samberg married singer-songwriter Joanna Newsom last night [Us], and as a wedding present he gave her a...
- George Zimmerman's divorce can't move forward until Zimmerman is served with papers, BUT no one can find him at the moment. [TMZ]
- Is Jim Carrey clinically depressed? Anonymous sources seem to think yes, totally, based on anecdotal information and the fact that we still don't have a third Ace Ventura movie. [Express Tribune]
- Miley Cyrus is a never nude. [Just Jared]
- Growing up in New York (NO BIG DEAL), Scarlett Johansson definitely ran into lots of "Don Jons," i.e. slick-haired, preening gym rats with an affinity for free internet porn. [YouTube]
- All Kerry Washington will do before the Emmys tonight is drink wine, eat cookies, and laugh about how wonderful life is. [E!]
- "Fuck that idiot." Idris Elba on his frenemy Liam Gallagher. [NME]
- Whhhaaaaaa? Naomi Campbell has reportedly been offered her very own talk show by a "major U.S. network." [Daily Mail]
- Pamela Anderson will run in the New York City Marathon because the power of charity compels her. [NYDN]
- This is an objective fact: the Fast and Furious franchise has become thoroughly wonderful. Don't resist its charms. Otherwise, Paul Walker and Vin Diesel will be out of work. [HuffPo]