GASP: Lebron James Flouts Royal Protocol, Puts Arm Around Duchess Kate

As you may know, last night, Duchess Catherine and her bloke Prince William attended one barney of a basketball match between the Brooklyn Nets and the Cleveland Cavaliers. After meeting (and then suffering through the sobering realization that they had nothing to talk about with) American royalty Beyoncé and Jay Z, Will and Kate then met basketball royalty, King James. And my, how the shit went down.

Apparently, people are up in arms after Lebron James took the piss out of Royal procedure and put his hand on the shoulder of the Duchess of Cambridge during a half-hearted, maybe quarter-hearted photo op. How very cavalier of the Cavalier. Apparently such PDA, while not strictly banned, is not anywhere near customary or traditional. The Official Website of the British Monarchy has some recommendations regarding what to do with your body when you’re in the vicinity of Royalty:

For men this is a neck bow (from the head only) whilst women do a small curtsy. Other people prefer simply to shake hands in the usual way.

Yeah, okay I guess an arm on the shoulder would absolutely come as a surprise to me too if the only other dudes who have ever done that were my husband or other member of family (maybe there’s a pre-approved benign touching guest list?).

Apparently, Americans have a real penchant for disregarding the traditional royal greetings. The Telegraph points out that Michelle Obama made a similarly shocking gesture, when she ventured to side-hug the Queen of England back in 2009. Take that Redcoats! FREEDOM ISN’T FREE.

But can we be real for a sec? This photo is more painful than that Thanksgiving family photo you took right after nearly coming to blows with your mom’s side of the family over immigration policy. Everyone is tired. No one wants to be there. And none of those smiles are anywhere near genuine. #RoyalVisitUSA