Check Out this New Mobile App for the Health-Conscious Lazy Ass

Congratulations to the individuals who are eager to look as if they have worked out for a hot, healthy body without actually working out (uh, well, that’s almost everyone, I guess). Your life is about to get more convenient.

Tools like the vibrating fork or a big-brother wifi cloud will whip you into obedient self-control when it comes to eating, but if neither can sufficiently help you on your quest to be Not Fat, then consider trying HealthyOut. HealthyOut is another tech-based tool that uses the internet and cellphone to align your dietary goals with specific food deliveries.

Say, for instance, you love Thai food but you’re vegetarian and you want to lose five pounds in the next two months. HealthyOut will find somewhere serving a vegetarian, low-calorie Pad Thai close to your workplace or home and order it [Ed: I refuse to believe such a meal exists]. The app will even take things a step further and go ahead and order food for you, should you so desire. Every day at lunch and dinner time, the app will text you to let you know that they are planning on getting a specific meal delivered. Of course you can cancel a delivery, just in case you feel like eating normal, greasy Pad Thai for lunch (DON’T DO IT).

Naturally the app, which has a monthly membership price of $28 on top of the price of delivered food, is gaining popularity in New York City, where having both a kitchen and the time to cook your own meals is a luxury for many. For those who can afford it — the Gwyneths of the world, perhaps — it’s an interesting solution at the crossroads of “I want to be healthy” and “I’m too tired and lazy and/or busy to be healthy” — a place where many of us find ourselves in our lives.

For the health-conscious, on-the-go peasant (like the rest of us) who cannot afford delivery more than a few times a month (if even), you’ll have to just make do like the proles: Google “healthy foods.” Or just fuck it and get a dollar slice of pizza.

This App Won’t Let Your Food Delivery Mess with Your Diet Goals [Fast Company]