All day long the news channels have been running this clip of Ann Coulter telling Donny Deutsch she wishes Jews would convert to Christianity to "become perfected," which amused me vaguely now that I'm pretty sure what she does qualifies as "performance art," until I saw the nine thousandth pundit come on and decry her "anti-Semitism" and finally felt compelled to point out what is really very obvious to anyone with experience as a self-hating Gentile: Ann Coulter seriously has a massive hard-on for the Jews.

She is so totally pro-Semitic she is dating a Jew, probably the latest in a long string of Jews, at least one of whom, down the line, had a mom who objected to her not on the basis of her batshit brand of batshitism but her supposed "Christianity," and when Ann looked into the whole conversion thing and realized how insanely complicated the Jews make it versus the whole "splash of water" method she thought, "Well for fuck's sake, we managed to eliminate the red tape here, and we're the biggest religion in the world. What's their excuse for making this like Soviet Russia??" Also, so you know: "We know we're all sinners" is basically tantamount to saying, "I, too, have had my share of abortions." Don't worry though, none of the unborn were potential Jews, because you can't be Jewish without a Jewish mother! Which, praise Jesus, Ann Coulter will never be. The "mother" part, especially.