You Can Charter a Plane to Join the Mile High Club

If you’ve been itching to have sex in a plane but your shit-eating grin always gives you away, great news! Next time you’re in Las Vegas, you can charter a private aircraft explicitly for the purpose of doing it while soaring through the clouds, high above the desert.

Because the type of person who actively seeks to join the Mile High Club probably visits Vegas regularly, anyway.

KLAS reports that LoveCloud sells a 40-minute ride for $799, or you can upgrade to 90 minutes for $1,299. Cold, hard American cash gets you a trip over such sights as the Hoover Dam and the Strip, as well as a “Mile High VIP” card at the completion of your flight.

It must be noted that your tipsy aunts, Hoda and KLG, are not sold on the idea. They make a good point that the illicitness is the whole point. Unless you’ve got to sneak sheepishly past a flight attendant, why bother?

The biggest problem, though, is that tacky performance suede-like material they’ve spread over the bed, as though this were some 1970s swingers party. The company’s owner assured KLAS that, “After every flight, Love Cloud has a cleaning service that cleans every part of the aircraft with specific cleaning products to kill any and all germs.” Sorry, but I’m not letting my butt touch anything with that texture that’s already been “christened” by someone else’s butt.