British divorcee Amanda Rodgers decided she'd finally had enough of "playing the field" and married the only one she knows will love her loyally without any of the drama and bullshit—-her loving dog Sheba.
In what's being described as a "romantic" ceremony (NO. STAHHHHP.), Rodgers and her dog wed in Croatia surrounded by 200 guests, according to The Mirror:
The 46-year-old divorcee wore black stockings and suspenders for the ceremony while Sheba wore a more traditional white bridal frock. The Metro reports that she said: "Sheba had been in my life for years, making me laugh and comforting me when I was feeling low. I couldn't think of anything more I'd need from a life partner."
I'm assuming that for Sheba, this was probably one of those "surprise weddings" we've all been hearing so much about. They're calling this "weird news," but I'd rather call it "why the hell not," news! I mean, fuck it. Let's all marry our dogs. I'm not necessarily saying I approve of this, but when I read it I did immediately rattle off an instant list of reasons why my dog would make a better life partner than my current boyfriend. I'm talking about true love/soul mate kinds of stuff. I just mean, in general, there's a couple of reasons why the dog is just easier to live with: