Why Is There Still Just One Damn Lady Smurf in the Smurfdom?According to the cast list for Smurfs 2, there are the 20 male Smurfs and one lady Smurf. On the men's side there's Papa, Grouchy, Clumsy, Vanity, Narrator, Brainy, Handy, Gutsy, Hefty, Panicky, Farmer, Greedy, Party Planner, Jokey, Smooth, Baker, Passive-Aggressive, Clueless, Social, and Crazy. On the women's side, there's Smurfette. Of course, her personality is being female, because that's a characteristic in the same way "Brainy" and "Passive-Aggressive" are.

You can tell the five writers* just gave up on the script — Social Smurf? Party Planner Smurf? And how is that not the same Smurf? — so maybe they just threw in the Smurftowel instead of trying something new with the characters. Yes, I get that Smurfette was created by villain Gargamel to wreak havoc in the all-male Smurfdom, but isn't that an aspect that could be easily reworked to be a slightly smaller amount of godawful sexist Smurfshit? Gargamel has plenty of evil in him, he doesn't need to rely on such tired tactics. Give him some credit.

But if the Smurfs are gonna go full hog with their creepy single lady as object of desire and derision, perhaps they could introduce the following Smurfs: Big Daddy, Handsy, Social Drinker, Socially Awkward, Touch It, Maxim Intern, Nice Guy, and Blow Job. Any others to add?

*Always the sign of a quality movie! More writers means more quality!

[Sociological Images]