U.S. Officials Question 3-Month-Old Baby On Terrorism Ties Thanks to Botched Visa Form

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A three-month-old baby was taken in for questioning at the U.S. Embassy in London after his grandfather mistakenly marked the purpose of his trip to the U.S. as “terrorism” on the immigration form. There’s…a box for that? Genius! What a flawless system.

According to The Guardian, Paul Kenyon was planning to fly to Orlando with baby Harvey and other members of his family, and was tasked with filling out everyone’s visa documents. All was well until Kenyon got to Harvey’s form—specifically, the part that helpfully asks whether the purpose of the trip is to commit terrorism. From the paper:

On the part of the Esta form which reads “Do you seek to engage in or have you ever engaged in terrorist activities, espionage, sabotage, or genocide?” Kenyon ticked yes instead of no.
He only learned of his error when his grandson’s travel was refused. “I couldn’t believe that they couldn’t see it was a genuine mistake and that a three-month-old baby would be no harm to anyone,” said the 62-year-old.

Officials, perhaps shocked that someone had actually marked the box affirmatively, required the baby to appear at the embassy in London for questioning, a full five hours away from Harvey’s home in Cheshire. The trip was ultimately for naught, however, since Harvey cannot yet speak.

“I thought about taking him along in an orange jumpsuit, but thought better of it,” Kenyon told The Guardian. [Author’s note: WHY DIDN’T YOU.] “They didn’t appear to have a sense of humour over it at all and couldn’t see the funny side. [Author’s note: Fiiiiine.] He went on:

“He’s obviously never engaged in genocide, or espionage, but he has sabotaged quite a few nappies in his time, though I didn’t tell them that at the US embassy.”

Love this guy. He even managed to keep his spirits up after the new visa didn’t arrive in time for the family’s trip. England for President!

 
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