Not going to lie, this video is probably the closest any of us are ever going to get to a real-life sex date with Tom Hiddleston. So let's run with it, shall we?

When you get done watching the video, take a moment to look around for your underwear. You threw them away somewhere during the part where Hiddleston actually starts reciting Shakespeare to you. It's OK. Just tell your boss it's a nervous tick and you might not get fired. Now drink a cool glass of water and remind yourself this isn't his Match.com dating profile video—it's just a commercial for a car. He's not actually speeding over to your house to read you poetry all night or anything like that. So settle down and get back to work, aka spending the rest of the day Googling Loki fan fiction erotica.