RIP!!!! Screencap via Netflix.

And now, for the latest bulletin from the great British pastry conflagration: Seems the BBC has no intention of letting slip its grip on the Victoria sponge-scented enthusiasm of the UK (and indeed the world), and reportedly plans to launched a competitor to Bake Off, now that the show has fucked off to Channel 4.


That’s according to the Telegraph, which reported that, “Sources said that a cookery contest featuring the 81-year-old [Mary Berry], as well as former Giedroyc and Perkins, was already under discussion.” An “insider” also told the Mirror: “We’ve got three of the fab four staying with us. We’re thrilled,” and, “The chances of us reuniting Mary, Mel and Sue are very high.”

Of course, the Telegraph also notes the BBC will have to tread carefully:


The corporation would face stiff opposition if it attempted to copy the format of Bake Off too closely.

Love Productions, the company that owns the brand, forced the BBC to pay damages after accusing the broadcaster of “ripping off” the format to create Hair, a BBC Three show about amateur hairdressers.

Maybe they can move the proceedings to a charming parlor filled with doilies?

And don’t you worry, Mary Berry is going to get hers:


The BBC is understood to have told Berry that she will be placed at the heart of the corporation’s cookery line-up and will be styled as the broadcaster’s number one television chef until she chooses to retire.

Would you mess with Mary Berry? Personally, I would not.