Today in "Uuuuuuuuuuuugh...ugh..uugh...[dies]": A Texas schoolteacher is defending herself against charges that she molested a 7-year-old female student by countering that she couldn't possibly have touched that student—the student is black and the teacher is a racist who thinks touching black people is gross! LOOPHOLE! My lord, Texas.

Via Wonkette via KHOU:

The girl said when she told her teacher to stop, Irene Stokes, 61, told her to get out of the classroom, according to court records. The girl told investigators that Stokes made her stand out in the hallway outside of the class and then refused to allow her to eat lunch or take a test.

She (said she) doesn’t like to even touch the black children on their hand, she shies away when they try to hug her — she admitted to being prejudice,” Blanchard said [sic].

See??? Would someone who hates black children emotionally traumatize and violate the physical sanctity of a black child? Sexual assault is obviously an act of love! Or, wait...fucking EEW, LADY.

In conclusion:

Teacher Accused of Molestation Says She's Too Racist to Be GuiltyS

Texas Teacher Explains She’s Far Too Racist To Have Molested That Black Seven Year Old [Wonkette]