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New York, 4:52 PM
Sat Nov 21
50 posts in the last 24 hours
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11/17/09
I am glad I didn't have daughters - or sons for that matter. The responsibility for teaching young women to respect/protect themselves while not being afraid to live, and the difficulty in raising responsible young men who are barraged with images of violence and degradation everywhere is paralyzing to me. #hitabitch
11/17/09
Little did I know, I was reducing his chances of domestic violence! #hitabitch
11/17/09
A much better way to demonstrate this is that when you hit someone, you're potentially hitting anyone that comes in contact with them, too. And if those people hit someone as a result, it doesn't take a genius to figure out how widespread the damage becomes and it doesn't take an Oscar-winner to visualize it either.
It's an exponential problem, and people need to be made to feel accountable for it be reduced. #hitabitch
11/17/09
11/17/09
I thought not. #hitabitch
11/17/09
"Now, play again an imagine that this woman is your daughter/sister/mother/niece." #hitabitch
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11/17/09
I mean, the people who made this PSA are 100% idiots, but I say this more as a despairing observation.
11/17/09
11/17/09
I have a shoebox full of pictures of myself, displaying the damage of beatings by my ex. He liked to photograph me after the fact, and I retained the pictures that were later used as evidence. They are not pretty, and most people would react with horror or disgust. These are normal reactions.
This "game" encourages the opposite reaction. Abuse is not sexy, it's not a movie, it's not something to play like a game.
If you want to be effective, show the brutality, the sheer in-humaneness of it. Because that's what abuse is: brutal and inhumane. #hitabitch
11/17/09
You are absolutely right. Abuse is not sexy, it's not the fun kind of dangerous, it's not something to take lightly and glitz up.
This "anti-violence" ad makes no sense and I don't think it will connect in the way that the designers say it will. #hitabitch
11/17/09
I'm glad such creativity is being devoted to addressing the problem. This was just a major miss. #hitabitch
11/17/09
11/17/09
Man I hate internet people. #hitabitch
11/17/09
11/17/09
11/17/09
@sarogreen: Here you go, one authentic hug. #hitabitch
11/17/09
But we should have! Fuck, now I'm just depressed. #hitabitch
11/17/09
11/05/09
11/05/09
I left an abusive and terrifying relationship four and a half years ago. Please know that it does get better--you will move on, and one of the first things to subside once you get help is the shame. It took me a while to admit to people the extent of the situation, but once I did, I found it incredibly liberating. It saddens me deeply to hear Rihanna say she is embarrassed.
One thing I learned about abusers is that they are frequently the most charming, overly sweet, and undetectably manipulative people you will ever meet. This is why the whole world initially thought that Chris Brown was a sweet, loving boyfriend. It's seldom the dirtbag K.Fed's of the world that get outed as abusers (although of course it does happen). Most often it's the guys who everyone describes as teddy-bears. So when this "teddy-bear" turns on you, you just wonder what you did to provoke it, or you feel sorry for him that he's going through such a hard time, and oh-look-he's-so-sorry!
I'm a smart woman. I am an educated woman. I am a feminist woman, and the daughter of an Army ranger who knows how to defend herself. So I thought this could never happen to me. Even after I left, I had a period of thinking that maybe it wasn't abuse, even though he threw me down the stairs, choked me, punched, kicked and threw me against walls. The point is--abusers have many ways of controlling your life and your mind to the point that you doubt your victimhood. It wasn't your fault, and it WAS his.
I'm proud of you for your strength. And I apologize for the length of my message (I could go on for days!). But please seek therapy when you leave. It'll be the (second) best thing you ever did. DM me if you need to talk more. #rihannainterview
11/05/09
I appreciate that she is speaking out even after she went back to Chris Brown and left him again. If anything, maybe it will help people understand just how difficult it is to be involved in an abusive relationship, and how it can be difficult to leave for a myriad of reasons. It would be nice if we all behaved perfectly in accordance with our politics at all times, but the fact is, we don't, and it takes a brave person to be willing to own up when they fall short of the ideal. #rihannainterview
11/05/09
Even on such a liberal site, to see so many people blaming the victim, making comments about what she must have done to him to make him do that, etc, it's really scary. Did anyone else see those comments there? Really scary.
I think she did an incredible job in that interview. I don't really see anything outrightly negative about it. #rihannainterview
11/05/09