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whip it good
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whip it good
girl crush
Awesome Human Being: Kathreya From Big Brother UK 9
I've never been one to watch Big Brother, and certainly not any of the versions from other countries, but today I met Kathreya, a housemate in the current season of Big Brother UK 9. Between her love of cookies, her fashion sense and her general, giddy ridiculousness, she's like a living cartoon character. I could watch this woman all day and night. Truly wonderful casting. Oh, and when I said her "love of cookies," I mean she really loves them. (She simulates an orgasm when talking about them.) Try watching this and not get the urge to scream, "Cookies!" at people.
Girl Crush: Orgasmic Cookie Eating Big Brother UK 9 Contestant [Street Carnage]
self-help
John Prescott's Ugly Common Person's Guide To Coping With Eating Disorders
Remember that deputy Prime Minister who resigned two years ago with Tony Blair only to resurface a year and a half later with a memoir about his decades-long struggle with bulimia? The British press sure does! And while coverage of this confession has generally fallen into the category of "merciless mockfest", an interview in the latest British Esquire convinced me he was doing bulimics of the world a service. Because while writing about your eating disorder isn't really a British thing to do, John Prescott's method of dealing with his eating disorder is kind of hilariously British, starting with the way his wife caught wind of the problem: she noticed symptoms she'd learned about from Princess Di. Which is, of course, the grand irony: the kids all assume eating disorders are the path to looking like Di and Nicole Richie when, ha ha ha, Prescott pukes his food too! Herewith, John Prescott's Stiff Upper Esophagus Guide To To Coming To Terms With Your Puking Problem, culled from Esquire. More »
The Posh Thickens?
Welcome to the photo that captivated a nation. Over the weekend it caught the media agape: What, the papers asked simply, earnestly even, is up with those jeans? A few days into the news cycle and an issue of New! is spinning the development to bolster its assertion that Posh has "swapped diets" with Britney Spears. (Lest you doubt the airtightness of this story, Posh has not only been photographed recently in numerous Mexican restaurants, she has been befriending Eva Longoria. Who owns a restaurant!) Anyway, I'll scan all this for you when I get back, but in the meantime…developing
leftovers
Joan Rivers Gets Booted For Cursing On Air • Demand For "Older" Models Rises
Joan Rivers was kicked off the set of the U.K. show Loose Women after calling Russell Crowe some naughty names on live television (she was unaware the show was filmed live). • Demand for "older" (over 25) models has grown with companies seeking to appeal to baby boomers. • A woman hangs herself after a three-year feud with a nasty neighbor. • A bunch of British celebrities we have never heard of had their pictures taken without make up and Photoshop. • Is anyone else a little bit shocked that Penelope Cruz wears somewhat cheap clothing on a movie set or have celebrity weeklies and fashion hype burned away my judgment? • Are single-issue politics moving Clinton supporters to Obama or is it the fact they are in the same fucking party with similar platforms to begin with? • BWE looks at the suburban hipster pastime of taking super ironic Glamour Shot photos. • Foreign airlines are prospering more than U.S. carriers because they don't compete with local carriers on their route. And they give you food! • Nancy Pelosi is super rich! • The Elian Gonzalez Legal Age Countdown Clock, this is kinda wrong, right?
MagHag UK
Okay, so I knew who Sienna Miller was, but I didn't know that she was dating someone named Rhys Ifans — throughout the story I actually thought "Ifans" was UK slang for the iPhone enabled citizen paparazzi, so I was sort of confused — and he is older than her and she is super happy. "The big, big thing I've discovered, the big secret, is that it's all about how happy you are. People forget your flaws and imperfections if they see you're happy." Put another way, they forget your existence if they see you are happy and it's with someone who the photo evidence would not be sufficiently valuable to make it worthwhile trying to destroy said happiness, but whatever. Oh! She's in a movie with Keira Knightley written by Keira Knightley's mom and she claims she had to gain weight for the part. (Lindsay Lohan was supposed to have the role.) (God what a fucking trainwreck just typing those words….) (Click pic for more.)
Mag Hag UK
One of the coolest things about being a blogger loosely connected to pop culture in a foreign country is that you don't feel bad not recognizing the faces on the covers of the women's magazines. Case in point: Denise Van Outen. Apparently she is renowned for flashing her boobs at Prince Charles, stealing an ashtray from Buckhingham Palace and dating someone named Jay Kay in the nineties. Like in Cosmo America they make her fill out a questionnaire filled with questions such as "The one thing I know about men that I wish I knew ten years ago is…" and her answer, "You have to let them think they came up with the idea," is pretty decent. Also, she advocates dating dudes in their twenties because that's when "all the good ones" get snatched up and weighs in on what is apparently a white-hot topic in Britain right now, WAGs. (Wives And Girlfriends of footballers, but you knew that, even if I had to actually Wikipedia it to make sure.) "It's all too easy to attack WAGs for being gold-diggers but, believe me, there are plenty of men who need that type of girl because it makes them feel happy." Reading Cosmo UK is to reading Cosmo America as eating a Chipotle burrito is to eating a pack of Bugles, which is neatly displayed in a reader letter you can see if you click the headline.
letter from london
Sorry London, Yesterday Was Just A Really Crap Day
Sorry I was in such a bad mood yesterday, London. I had a pain in my head that I would liken to the Kingsley Amis metaphysical hangover, except about 1000 times less literate, and to make matters worse it was all on account of white wine so it's not like I was dabbling some new Winehousian level of debauchery. (It also didn't help that I had spent the morning trying to read it off with Notes From Underground, which is hilarious, but not exactly packed with electrolytes.) (Sample line: All my life I've been incapable even of picturing any other love, and I've reached the point now of sometimes thinking that love consists precisely in the right, voluntarily granted by the beloved object, to be tyrannized over. In my underground dreams as well, I never pictured love to myself otherwise than as a struggle; for me it always started from hatred and ended with moral subjugation, and afterwards I couldn't even picture to myself what to do with the subjugated object.) (Also the cheeseburger was truly gross.) Anyhow! More »
UK-based sex toy company LoveHoney has announced the launch of the UK Sex Toy Awards. But instead of a "panel of experts" deciding on what the best sex toys are, LoveHoney is looking for 20 laywomen (heh, "lay") to test out the company's top 10 best sellers and then rate them. (You can apply to be one of those women here.) The winner will be announced in September. [LoveHoney via AVN]
leftovers
Having Kids Will Make You Sad • A 10-Year-Old Gives Birth
Having kids sends many couples into downward spiral of sadness. •Albena Danailova has been made the first female concertmaster (or leader of the first violin section) of the Vienna State Opera. • More Austrian news! Crazy-Dad Fritzl says he was aware he was abusing/raping daughter but wanted "lots of children." • The UK is trying to promote more women to join the aerospace sector. • Uh, duh: incontinence and other pelvic organ disorders can limit a woman's libido. • A 10-year-old gives birth and a Latino immigrant is arrested on rape charges. • Australia outlaws nipple and genital piercings for children under 16-years-old. • Women are more easily persuaded face-to-face while men prefer e-mail. • The Brits are trying really hard to persuade people! They claim that nagging also works. • The age-gap widens as men get older and marry younger women. • After Eight Bells, Jockey Panel plans to review thoroughbreds. • A woman files a claim against Norwalk, CT claiming dog poop ruined her family outing. • Asshole-of-the-day runs over and kills a 13-pound dog and then sues owners for damages to his car.More »
Unmentionables
UK superstore Tesco is drawing negative attention for selling a plunging padded bra designed for 7- to 8-year-old girls. Fashion lecturer David Morris called the bra "salacious"; some moms are "shocked" and find the bra "appalling." But in true business-speak-spin, A Tesco spokesperson says: "It is a product designed for girls at that self-conscious age when they are just developing. It is designed to cover up, not flatter, and was developed after speaking to parents. It is described as a padded bra for trade description reasons." Because, you know, it's a padded bra. Which will make an 8-year-old's breasts look bigger. [Telegraph]
signs of the apocalypse
The Terrorists Have Won: Hooters Invades The UK
Hooters, the "breastaurant" chain birthed in Florida, is currently spreading like a virus around the globe and has set its sights on Mother England. There is one Hooters in Great Britain — in Nottingham — but the company plans to have a whopping 36 locations in the UK by 2012. In today's Guardian, Julie Bindel (who visited the Nottingham establishment) writes, "The Hooters concept combines simplicity and misogyny, offering food of the finger-licking variety — burgers, wings, fries — and young waitresses wearing uniforms reminiscent of 1970s cheerleaders." She seems plainly horrified to have seen a "No fat chicks" sticker and child-size T-shirts for kids as young as three that read, "Life Begins at Hooters." Kirsty Bowen is one of a handful of people coordinating campaigns against branches opening in their towns. Bowen claims that a proposed restaurant in Sheffield would affect the neighborhood and encourage sex-industry businesses to move in. And she has evidence: More »
So You Think You Can Dance
In the UK late last year, the Royal Ballet made history by casting Carlos Acosta in the role of Romeo — the first time a black male was used as a principal dancer. While black male principals are rare, black ballerinas are almost non-existent. Neither the Royal Ballet nor the English National Ballet currently employs a single black ballerina. Dancer and choreographer Cassa Pancho founded Ballet Black, a company for black and Asian dancers. "Ten or 15 years ago you'd hear that black women didn't have the physique for ballet," she says. "You'd hear 'they have big bums and flat feet.' I've spoken to some who were told to go and get their feet broken and reset for pointe work as it was felt they were too flat." But Pancho believes things are slowly shifting: "In the past, a perfectly acceptable attitude might have been to say 'we want 16 identical white blond girls.' At least it's now about hiring the best dancer, whether she's black or white." [Guardian]
she said/he said
British Bloke Takes Issue With Writer's Men = Eggs Analogy
"Men are like eggs: They must hatch or go bad." So began a story by writer Laura Nolan in the Times of London earlier this month, titled "Where Have All The Men Gone?" "We have an overload of man-boys — which leaves a generation of single, thirtysomething women who are their natural mates bewildered," Nolan noted, adding that she has to constantly read stories by scientists urging women not to wait to have kids and not to get caught up in their careers: "I want to point out that I work to eat, and that earning a salary funds the social life needed to meet new people." By the time a woman's thirties roll around, she went on, the good men are taken and the ones who are left are neurotic commitment-phobes with weird issues. No doubt many women would agree with her, but not many men! In fact, today, William Leith responds to Nolan's article thusly: "How can you blame men for doing what they are genetically programmed to do? I would never go around blaming women for following their specific biological imperatives." More »
Crazy In Love
A 23-year-old British woman named Lee Amor called her ex-boyfriend 10,783 times in two months, reports Telegraph. Amor (which means love!) sent a text, video or made a call every 8 minutes for 65 days straight to former flame Timothy Mortimore. She falsely accused him of being the father of her child, sent him a positive pregnancy test, followed him and his new girlfriend and visited his home and workplace. Mortimore, thankfully, has acquired a restraining order. But don't tell Ms. Amor about this list of sex texts from Cosmo, including "naughty notes" like I'll pole dance 4 you. U bring the pole..., Ur ass looks gr8 in those jeans and Was in such a rush! 4got 2 wear a bra. LOL! And: Ew. [Telegraph, Cosmo]
A 23-year-old British woman named Lee Amor called her ex-boyfriend 10,783 times in two months, reports Telegraph. Amor (which means love!) sent a text, video or made a call every 8 minutes for 65 days straight to former flame Timothy Mortimore. She falsely accused him of being the father of her child, sent him a positive pregnancy test, followed him and his new girlfriend and visited his home and workplace. Mortimore, thankfully, has acquired a restraining order. But don't tell Ms. Amor about this list of sex texts from Cosmo, including "naughty notes" like I'll pole dance 4 you. U bring the pole..., Ur ass looks gr8 in those jeans and Was in such a rush! 4got 2 wear a bra. LOL! And: Ew. [Telegraph, Cosmo]
rag trade
Nothing Says "Maturity" Quite Like Heidi Montag
- Clothing line Anchor Blue has signed Heidi Montag to be its new face. Because execs want to appeal to a "slightly older" demographic. No, really. [WWD, sub req'd]
- Would you like to be Erin O'Connor's escort to a show during London Fashion Week? Well lucky for you she's holding a contest with Vogue UK. To win her hand (or, you know, the seat next to her) all you have to do is compose her a poem. Start work-shopping those dirty limericks here! [Vogue UK]
- Thrilling/disturbing news: Steve & Barry's has inked a licensing deal allowing them to create and sell t-shirts bearing images and logos from The Little Rascals, The Andy Griffith Show, The Beverly Hillbillies, The Brady Bunch, The Love Boat, The Twilight Zone, Happy Days, Laverne & Shirley, Cheers and Beverly Hills 90210. And if you feel a twinge of sadness that the average Steve & Barry's customer has probably never known the joy of watching an episode of Laverne & Shirley, just think of the poor children in China who will be sewing them. [WWD, sub req'd]
the good, the bad & the ugly
The Style-Impaired Show Up For ELLE Style Awards
Last night in London ELLE UK hosted the ELLE Style Awards and you'd think that the people who turned up would be, you know, well dressed! But you'd have thought wrong. KT Tunstall, for example, seemed to mistake the event for a belated Halloween party and came clad as a sparkly bumblebee. Keira Knightley, also getting into the All Hallow's Eve spirit, came as a ghostly goth girl. And someone needs to stage an intervention with model (H)Agyness Deyn, who came in the best/awful 80's costume I've ever seen. Oh, and then there was Stella McCartney, featured at left with Kate Hudson (whose dress lost all shape once she removed the jacket), who I officially double-dare to turn up somewhere and not look totally fucking miserable. Smile, Stella. Please. The full good, bad, and ugly, after the jump. More »
duh
