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New York, 1:46 AM
Fri Dec 18
66 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #redcarpet more →

    Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers

    Oscar Fashion Critic Kimora Lee Simmons Has A Very Limited Vocabulary

    "Fishy" Is Fabulous: Oscar Fashion 2008

    Gary Busey Scares The Crap Out Of Jennifer Garner And Ryan Seacrest

    Ellen Page: Your Dress Is Pretty — Don't Look Miserable

    Josh Brolin And Diane Lane: Gonna Make Beautiful Babies

    The Dictionary Definition Of Glamour? See Here

    Julian Schnabel and Olatz Garmendia: The Diving Bell And The Butterfly

    Good For Lisa Rinna. Seriously.

    Kristen Chenowith Finally Dresses Like A Woman And Not A Tween
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of littlebunnyfoofoo littlebunnyfoofoo
    02/23/09

    In reply to Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers
    Ladies! You place your hand on your hip so that your arm doesn't squash up against your side and look twice its size! Come on! And don't stand with your feet together evenly or your thighs and hips will look *gasp* curved. Also, remember: Overhead lighting is not your friend!


    I could do this all day...

     Reply
    littlebunnyfoofoo was starred littlebunnyfoofoo was unstarred
    Image of Stabby McStabberson Stabby McStabberson
    02/23/09

    In reply to Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers


    amateurs.

     Reply
    Stabby McStabberson was starred Stabby McStabberson was unstarred
    Image of Plum-Pie Plum-Pie
    02/23/09

    In reply to Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers
    Yesterday I remembered an article from a few years ago, about the Half-Karen, a moddle pose in which your arms are folded across yourself for protection.


    [www.hermenaut.com]

     Reply
    Plum-Pie was starred Plum-Pie was unstarred
    Image of Remedios Varo can't see no huevos. Remedios Varo can't see no huevos.
    02/23/09

    In reply to Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers
    It's okay, I have a default pose, too: Sitting down, leaning on the edge of my seat, big thumbs up and goofy grin. People make fun of me for it.
     Reply
    Remedios Varo can't see no huevos. was starred Remedios Varo can't see no huevos. was unstarred
    Image of ♥AntiSocialSocialite♥ ♥AntiSocialSocialite♥
    02/23/09

    In reply to Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers
    am I the only one who loved Miley's fractal dress???
     Reply
    ♥AntiSocialSocialite♥ was starred ♥AntiSocialSocialite♥ was unstarred
    Image of Sputnik_Sweetheart Sputnik_Sweetheart
    02/23/09

    @BeccaSaurus Rex: No, if loving Miley's dress is wrong, I don't ever want to be right.
     Reply
    Sputnik_Sweetheart was starred Sputnik_Sweetheart was unstarred
    Image of dianersb was bit by a zombie dianersb was bit by a zombie
    02/23/09

    In reply to Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers
    In the picture on the right, some guy floofed out her dress and held her stuff. I would look like that too, if some guy followed me around floofing out my dress and holding my stuff. As it is, I looked like a slightly deflated bag lady.
     Reply
    dianersb was bit by a zombie was starred dianersb was bit by a zombie was unstarred
    Image of badmutha badmutha
    02/23/09

    @dianersb was bit by a zombie: Heh, heh, she got floofed. It sounds dirty.
     Reply
    badmutha was starred badmutha was unstarred
    Image of dirtybee dirtybee
    02/23/09

    In reply to Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers
    My personal favorite is where you have your back to the cameras, and then BAM! You turn your head a la Blue Steel.
     Reply
    dirtybee was starred dirtybee was unstarred
    Image of Lyesmith Lyesmith
    02/23/09

    @dirtybee needs hugs.: Heehee, that reminds me of



    Oh Dean.
     Reply
    Lyesmith was starred Lyesmith was unstarred
    Image of dirtybee dirtybee
    02/23/09

    @Lyesmith: NO. NO. That is AWESOME!
     Reply
    dirtybee was starred dirtybee was unstarred
    Image of Fridge Hussy : Is finally heading back to uni! Fridge Hussy : Is finally heading back to uni!
    02/23/09

    @Lyesmith: Thank you!
     Reply
    Fridge Hussy : Is finally heading back to uni! was starred Fridge Hussy : Is finally heading back to uni! was unstarred
    Image of badmutha badmutha
    02/23/09

    @Lyesmith: I do love me some Winchester boys.
     Reply
    badmutha was starred badmutha was unstarred
    Image of funnyface funnyface
    02/23/09

    In reply to Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers
    I always hated the "coy glance over my shoulder" pose, personally.
     Reply
    funnyface was starred funnyface was unstarred
    Image of Mmmmkay (gellin' and Jezebelin) Mmmmkay (gellin' and Jezebelin)
    02/23/09

    @funnyface: Ughh, me too! Its like "oh hi there, you surprised me, I just happened to be standing here all done up in a pretty dress making bedroom eyes, and you caught me in a private moment of sexiness with myself, prrrrr." LOATHE.
     Reply
    Mmmmkay (gellin' and Jezebelin) was starred Mmmmkay (gellin' and Jezebelin) was unstarred
    Image of Lyesmith Lyesmith
    02/23/09

    In reply to Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers
    "Those pictures will live forever." ... Come on. No one really gives a shit about those pictures. Or about the Academy Awards. Not really, at least. What real significance do they offer to the world, or, as it is implied, to the historians of the future?

    Who cares?
     Reply
    Lyesmith was starred Lyesmith was unstarred
    Image of marshmallory marshmallory
    02/23/09

    @Lyesmith: Now now, "forever" in Hollywood-speak clearly means "until next year when we have a new batch of photos to pick apart like vultures on a carcass".
     Reply
    marshmallory was starred marshmallory was unstarred
    Image of Mkp-hearts-NYC Mkp-hearts-NYC
    02/23/09

    In reply to Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers
    Meanwhile all the menfolk just stand there in various degrees of tuxiness. The biggest variation I saw last night was between toes-out and toes-straight-ahead
     Reply
    Mkp-hearts-NYC was starred Mkp-hearts-NYC was unstarred
    Image of morninggloria morninggloria
    02/23/09

    @Mkp-braaaains-NYC: I was hoping for the super-gay one leg kicked back pose.
     Reply
    morninggloria was starred morninggloria was unstarred
    Image of BeckySharper BeckySharper
    02/23/09

    @Mkp-braaaains-NYC: Except for Mickey Rourke in his white suit and unwashed hair and little picture of his dead chihuahua around his neck. Frankly, it was a refreshing change from the tuxiness.
     Reply
    BeckySharper was starred BeckySharper was unstarred
    Image of Mkp-hearts-NYC Mkp-hearts-NYC
    02/23/09

    @morninggloria: So few of today's gay actors really have the commitment to have their limbs deboned to achieve just that effect.
     Reply
    Mkp-hearts-NYC was starred Mkp-hearts-NYC was unstarred
    Image of Mkp-hearts-NYC Mkp-hearts-NYC
    02/23/09

    @BeckySharper: And the crazy wire-walker guy who had...the scarf that goes with a tux...but was wearing a leather jacket.
     Reply
    Mkp-hearts-NYC was starred Mkp-hearts-NYC was unstarred
    Image of livefreeordorota livefreeordorota
    02/23/09

    @BeckySharper: Except I can't look at Mickey Rourke for any extended period of time without wanting to dump him in a tub of lysol. Sadly, this is the only reason why I still haven't seen the Wrestler.
     Reply
    livefreeordorota was starred livefreeordorota was unstarred
    Image of badmutha badmutha
    02/23/09

    @livefreeordorota: I will co-sign on the Rourke lysol dumping need. And I don't want to see Marisa Tomei topless, and I really detest wrestling, so I am not going to see the Wrestler.
     Reply
    badmutha was starred badmutha was unstarred
    Image of morninggloria morninggloria
    02/23/09

    In reply to Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers
    Why don't more of them do the "broken down doll"?
     Reply
    morninggloria was starred morninggloria was unstarred
    Image of tscheese tscheese
    02/23/09

    @morninggloria: They're not broken enough.


    ...Yet.

     Reply
    tscheese was starred tscheese was unstarred
    Image of Mkp-hearts-NYC Mkp-hearts-NYC
    02/23/09

    @morninggloria: Menstrual cramps! The Hunchback! Now give me Lemmings!
     Reply
    Mkp-hearts-NYC was starred Mkp-hearts-NYC was unstarred
    Image of BeckySharper BeckySharper
    02/23/09

    @morninggloria: Or the "No Neck Monster!"
     Reply
    BeckySharper was starred BeckySharper was unstarred
    Image of boxspelunker boxspelunker
    02/23/09

    @BeckySharper: This one is my favorite. I also do "Tyrannosaurus Arms" and "LOOK AT MY CHIN."
     Reply
    boxspelunker was starred boxspelunker was unstarred
    Image of marshmallory marshmallory
    02/23/09

    In reply to Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers
    Hey, the hands on hips pose is flattering. I started doing it when I saw a photo of myself in which my upper arm looked like an eight-pound kielbasa.
     Reply
    marshmallory was starred marshmallory was unstarred
    Image of badmutha badmutha
    02/23/09

    @marshmallory: I am often afflicted with kielbasa-ism myself, especially in sleeveless pictures. I have to say I prefer to raise both arms up in the air, doing more of a strong man pose, to make my arms look their best.
     Reply
    badmutha was starred badmutha was unstarred
    Image of marshmallory marshmallory
    02/23/09

    @badmutha: I shall incorporate this into my pose repertoire. It shall be called "the badmutha".
     Reply
    marshmallory was starred marshmallory was unstarred
    Image of badmutha badmutha
    02/23/09

    @marshmallory: Why dear, I am flattered.
     Reply
    badmutha was starred badmutha was unstarred
    Image of tscheese tscheese
    02/23/09

    In reply to Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers
    I actually learned that I have no idea how to walk "like a woman". For some reason, on a number of separate occasions, people who do not know each other, I am repeatedly told that I "walk like a guy."


    How in fuck am I supposed to be walking, now? What exactly is gendered about my boorish swagger?

     Reply
    tscheese was starred tscheese was unstarred
    Image of Mkp-hearts-NYC Mkp-hearts-NYC
    02/23/09

    @tscheese: You're supposed to sway your hips a la Jessica Rabbit, duh, instead of stomping around like a hobbit or something.
     Reply
    Mkp-hearts-NYC was starred Mkp-hearts-NYC was unstarred
    Image of tscheese tscheese
    02/23/09

    @Mkp-braaaains-NYC: I have hips out to HERE. I'm so hippy you can almost smell the patchouli. But I can't seem to make those suckers sway. I'd probably lose my center of balance if I were to throw this pelvis around.
     Reply
    tscheese was starred tscheese was unstarred
    Image of musicpup musicpup
    02/23/09

    @tscheese: Swaying can be induced by walking in a straight line, like one foot in front of the other at a rapid pace. Or wearing high heels. Or throwing your hips out. But, you know. I don't do it normally.
     Reply
    musicpup was starred musicpup was unstarred
    Image of Mkp-hearts-NYC Mkp-hearts-NYC
    02/23/09

    @musicpup rodstaff: @tscheese: But you only need to do it when you're trying to lure someone around a corner or through some long swaying curtains or something. The rest of the time, that's like walking around with a pistol without the safety on.
     Reply
    Mkp-hearts-NYC was starred Mkp-hearts-NYC was unstarred
    Image of pandorasmittens pandorasmittens
    02/23/09

    @tscheese: Do you make eye contact with people as you pass, as if you possess some form of self-confidence? Do you walk comfortably, in shoes you enjoy, instead of teetering on 5 inch heels? Do you walk as if you have somewhere to go, as if the action of placing one foot in front of the other will somehow near you to your destination, instead of slowly and seductively, to impress the menfolk and make the ladies jealous?


    If you do this, you walk like a guy, and it is clearly your fault.

     Reply
    pandorasmittens was starred pandorasmittens was unstarred
    Image of Rare Affinity Rare Affinity
    02/23/09

    @tscheesetscheese: It means you have a natural unaffected gait, that has not been compromised by listening to some patronising gay guy on a catwalk reality show, who seems to think he knows how women should walk. Keep on walking tall, lady!
     Reply
    Rare Affinity was starred Rare Affinity was unstarred
    Image of boxspelunker boxspelunker
    02/23/09

    @tscheese: OMG ME TOO. My friend ran up behind me on campus a few years ago and was like, "boxspelunker!! I knew it was you!" I asked her how and she's like, "You have this weird, swaying walk that kinda looks like a drunk hobo. I mean... in like... a cute way." She later explained I do not really move my hips and instead I wobble back and forth at the shoulders. GO GO WOBBLEBODY.
     Reply
    boxspelunker was starred boxspelunker was unstarred
    Image of argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw?
    02/23/09

    In reply to Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers
    i feel as though myspace has eliminated the need for any type of training in this regard...


    because really, what have social networking sites taught us if not how to take ridiculously flattering self-portraits of our less than perfect selves?


    or am i the only vain, hyper-feminine geek here? hmmm. i might be.

     Reply
    argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? was starred argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? was unstarred
    Image of tscheese tscheese
    02/23/09

    @argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw?: Oh man, I have MASTERED the "hold the iSight way above my head! Stretch out my neck JUUUUST so while no wait hang on other side that side has a zit, okay, now, nose down, eyes toward the camera but SUBTLY LOOKING AWAY OMG, omg interesting fringe of emo hair DON'T MY EYES LOOK ENORMOUS AND TORMENTED! man I better take like 48 more of these" shot.
     Reply
    tscheese was starred tscheese was unstarred
    Image of saintbernadette saintbernadette
    02/23/09

    @argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw?: I think digital cameras are to blame, too. I was looking back at some college pics (about 10 years old) the other day, and I looked at SO many and thought, "We would totally have deleted these if we could have seen them right away."
     Reply
    saintbernadette was starred saintbernadette was unstarred
    Image of argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw?
    02/23/09

    @tscheese: ha! you could give internet profile pic lessons...
     Reply
    argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? was starred argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? was unstarred
    Image of argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw?
    02/23/09

    @saintbernadette: couldn't agree more.

    while i'm guilty of this too(i'm a serial de-tagger), i wonder what wonderfully embarrassing little moments we're denying future generations.
     Reply
    argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? was starred argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? was unstarred
    Image of Mkp-hearts-NYC Mkp-hearts-NYC
    02/23/09

    @tscheese: YES! slightly to the left, tilt down, peek to the side to highlight cheekbones and eye shape...BAM. This should last me until my next computer lab job lands me in front of an iMac.
     Reply
    Mkp-hearts-NYC was starred Mkp-hearts-NYC was unstarred
    Image of keep it under cover keep it under cover
    02/23/09

    @tscheese: Hahaha!!! Brilliant tutorial.


    Btw, has anyone seen pics of the Korean ulzzang fad? Youtube has the most incredible tutorials to teach girls how to transform themselves into anime characters using makeup and contact lenses, and then how to pose for webcam pics to maximize cuteness. The emo kids have NOTHING on these ulzzang girls. It's sheer crazy.


    If I knew how to post pictures, I would... *hint hint someone please tell me how*

     Reply
    keep it under cover was starred keep it under cover was unstarred
    Image of Cafezinha Cafezinha
    02/23/09

    @keep it under cover: Here's a link about it:


    [members.asianbeautyblog.com]

     Reply
    Cafezinha was starred Cafezinha was unstarred
    Image of badmutha badmutha
    02/23/09

    In reply to Hollywood Actresses Are A Bunch Of Posers
    I am tired of the teapot pose, but a few years ago there was the "ridiculously thrown back shoulders look while not breathing" thing done to perfection by Rene Zelwegger and Nicole Kidman. They all look crazy in real life.
     Reply
    badmutha was starred badmutha was unstarred
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