When the World Ends on Friday, Men Will Regret Not Having Had More Sex

A Harris Interactive poll commissioned by California online data-storage company Backblaze found that one in five Americans is genuinely concerned that the world will come to an end this Friday. We have to take the this with a huge grain of salt because it's in no way a real survey, but still: Damn. » 12/18/12 9:30am 12/18/12 9:30am

"Sandy Schmandy, We Might Have A Drought Soon," Say Worried…

If we weren't before, we should probably all be worrying about the ozone layer right about now: the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration reports that this past October was the fifth warmest ever, tied with the one in 2008. One repercussion of this unseasonably warm trend, says an analyst at Weather… » 11/17/12 12:30pm 11/17/12 12:30pm

Are You Part of the Doomsday 10 Percent?

A new poll has found that almost 15 percent of people on the planet think the world is going to come to an end during their lifetime. What's even more bizarre is that a full 10 percent of people worldwide think the Mayan calendar points to it ending right here in 2012. Are you one of them? If so, why aren't you out in… » 5/02/12 11:00pm 5/02/12 11:00pm

Saddam Hussein Made Up That WMD Thing To Deter Invaders

  • So it turns out Saddam Hussein lied about having WMD so the rest of the Axis of Evil would leave him alone. [CBS News]
  • How much would you bet even he couldn't have kept that lie up 935 times! [Wash Post
  • Isn't it funny how yesterday's enemies are today's...[Reuters]
  • The New York Times to endorse Hillary Clinton? Identity…
  • » 1/24/08 6:40pm 1/24/08 6:40pm

It's Official: Being A Woman Kinda Sucks (Except For The Love Of…

Every once in a while it becomes clear that in a lot of ways, being a woman is an unbelievably raw deal. As if it's not enough that once a month blood comes burbling out of our vaginas, as several articles in the news today attest, each stage of our lives tends to be accompanied by the looming threat of some kind of… » 8/21/07 7:00pm 8/21/07 7:00pm

Today God's Creatures Opened Up A Can Of Whup-Ass

In the criminal justice system, sexually-based offenses committed by animals are considered especially heinous. "I'd say it's probably been playing, or it may be even a sexual sort of thing," Queensland police Detective Senior Constable Craig Gregory told the Associated Press earlier today (or yesterday or maybe even… » 8/20/07 7:00pm 8/20/07 7:00pm

Bush Daughter To Wed, Possibly Reproduce; Deluge Drowns Lone Star State

This afternoon, from the Bush compound in Crawford, Texas, came the news that First daughter Jenna Bush and her boyfriend of two years, Karl Rove minion and Republispawn Henry Hager, are engaged and immediately, an angry rain threatened to overcome the entire state of Texas. Not that those incidents were related!… » 8/16/07 7:00pm 8/16/07 7:00pm

Broadway Momentarily Un-Gay: Clay Aiken Musical Cancelled

Moe is being interrogated by El Al as I type this, which means that her stock market/foreign policy-illuminating "Evening Purge" will be on hiatus until she returns from The Homeland next week. (My homeland, she keeps telling me. Not hers. Whatevs.) And so, back by not popular demand, my Bush-hating, animal-loving… » 8/15/07 7:00pm 8/15/07 7:00pm

Eddie Murphy Is Loyal — 'Til You Have His Baby

  • Eddie Murphy is on crack if he thinks a little bling is enough to convince the world that he treats his girlfriends well. Um, remember that you fathered and denied, Eddie? [People.com]
  • Oh come on people: There are enough real bombs in this world. Don't plant fake ones. [BBC]
  • Memo to President Bush: We already know that…
  • » 7/24/07 7:55pm 7/24/07 7:55pm

Eva Mendes Doesn't Have To Hate Herself 'Cause She Knows She's Hot

  • Aw! Eva Mendes says it's easy to get all "critical" of yourself when you're on the red carpet but that she doesn't let herself "fall into that" — but that's she also "thankful" for her "nice physique"! Pretty sad if this counts as having positive body image nowadays. [People]
  • In poor England it's all water, water…
  • » 7/23/07 6:36pm 7/23/07 6:36pm

Things That May Or May Not Surprise You: We Don't Like Bush, We Do Like…

  • Harry Potter! Yup, we pre-ordered our copy of the last-ever Harry Potter book. And we get to pick it up at 12:01 am tonight. We're super nervous about what's going to happen, too. We think that Snape isn't evil though. But we have a sneaking suspicion Harry is going to die. And we will be reading it all weekend to…
  • » 7/20/07 8:45pm 7/20/07 8:45pm

Oprah Pushing The Finding-A-Moral Agenda A Little Too Hard

  • Oprah's golden retriever Gracie died in May after an unfortunate choking incident and still Oprah is talking about it, only now she's putting that Oprah-branded spin on it saying that Gracie's death was really a hidden message that she needed to slow down and take more time to appreciate her own life. Seriously, we…
  • » 7/18/07 6:55pm 7/18/07 6:55pm

We Wish We'd Bought A 'Free Winona' T-Shirt Way Back When

  • Winona Ryder is speaking out now about her shoplifting. Honestly? No one gives a shit. [People]
  • In the UK, one in four 18-to-25-year olds cannot answer the following question: What is one eighth of 32? [BBC]
  • Al-Qaeda said to be "stepping-up" its presence in the U.S. Please God, no one tell Elisabeth Hasselbeck. The…
  • » 7/17/07 7:05pm 7/17/07 7:05pm

Simpsons Graffiti On Pagan Fields: Cute, But Where's Homer's Cock?

  • We were feeling kinda blue today. Then we saw this. [Boing Boing]
  • Now that Isaiah Washington has a new job maybe he'll stop his pointless bitching. The former Grey's Anatomy cast member been cast in 5 episodes of the upcoming TV show based on The Bionic Woman. [E!]
  • In the UK curry laced with ecstasy = attempted murder.…
  • » 7/16/07 7:00pm 7/16/07 7:00pm