Crack Is Wack - Jezebel

posts about #crackiswack more →
Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
Peaches Caught With Crack!
Sometimes Addicts Are Just A-Holes
Amy Winehouse Finally Releases New Song: A Racist, Cracked-Out Ditty
JENNIFER ANISTON CAUGHT WITH CRACK

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LindsayJoy's MBP is into S+M
08/23/09

In reply to Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
I watched True Blood and

SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER *************************************************************************
We see the queens leg at the end and then there was an episode preview and after you see Jessica all wet you then see a quick flash of a new red-headed vampire that appears to be in the queen's setting. I had to put the trailer into super slow-mo it is definitely a new powerful vampire, probably the queen. Weeeee!
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Mafalda para Presidente
08/20/09

In reply to Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
How generous of you, Jay Leno. Did you want a cookie?
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NellMood
08/20/09

In reply to Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
Can't you just picture the excited little faces of the sick children on the day that Jon Gosselin came to visit? Trying to puzzle out those confusing Ed Hardy shirts, asking their mommies what "douchebag" means after hearing a nurse mumble it, wondering why Elmo didn't come to visit instead?
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HaarzyLady
08/20/09

In reply to Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
Cancer Kid: "Mommy, I know I'm sick and we don't have that much money, but couldn't they get a real celebrity to visit us?"
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formergr promoted this comment HaarzyLady was starred HaarzyLady was unstarred

pmarble
08/20/09

In reply to Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
I have a hard time with Claire Danes blathering on about how much "fun" monogamy is when she participated in the break up of a long term relationship in which the woman was *seven months pregnant* and by all accounts started her latest relationship before she was done with the last. With that track record, the only graceful thing to do is not give vapid quotes about monogamy.
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purefog
08/20/09

@pmarble: Um -- maybe she has learned and changed?
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rd2uk promoted this comment purefog was starred purefog was unstarred

Maggita
08/20/09

@pmarble: It seemed to me like she was saying, "I have no idea how to be monogamous, but I'm trying really hard." I don't know why she can't be polyamorous or some other relationship variation. Monogamy is not the only option.
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burningdinner
08/20/09

In reply to Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
Whitney's impending interview: just another reason to relish the fact that I'm about to be unemployed. Thanks for helping me look on the bright side, Jez!
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morninggloria
08/20/09

In reply to Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
"Pauly Shore pulled a Christian Bale."

No he did not. I can't see how that's physically possible, because when Bale did it, I imagined him yelling at me during sex, and I really didn't get the same feeling with this Pauly Shore thing.
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Yahtzii
08/20/09

@morninggloria: Also, Christian Bale is generally acknowledged to have some talent. He can play the "tormented genius" card, while, as always, Pauly Shore is stuck with a deck of "entitled douche."
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morninggloria
08/20/09

In reply to Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
By appearing on Miss Universe, Heidi Montag decides to go after the coveted "basement dwelling pervert" and "sexually unfulfilled pageant mom" demographics.
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RainyKate
08/20/09

In reply to Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
What would Brian Boitano make/if he were here today?/He'd make us all a layer cake;/that's what Brian Boitano'd make.

I've been singing that since I saw the ad for the show.
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vulcanized
08/20/09

@RainyKate: When Brian Boitano was in the Olympics skating for the gold / he made two souffles and a rack of lamb / while wearing a blindfold.
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laureltreedaphne
08/20/09

In reply to Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
So, not to be horrible. But I HATE it when you see these random, C-list celebrities who have no actual talent going to visit children in hospitals or cancer wards. Come on. Jon Gosselin? I'm sure that really brightened the day of those kids...I doubt they have any idea who he is. Unless you are someone who the kids are going to be excited to meet, or you're someone with an actual talent for entertaining, like you're Criss Angel and you can do magic or something, don't do this BS "visiting the hospitals" crap. Take a chunk of your huge amount of money and pay for a clown to go visit them for a day, or donate something to the hospital, or send them all toys.
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Edited by laureltreedaphne at 08/20/09 9:47 AM laureltreedaphne was starred laureltreedaphne was unstarred

ampersandparade
08/20/09

@laureltreedaphne: Arguably a clown did visit them that day.
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BabyJane promoted this comment ampersandparade was starred ampersandparade was unstarred

babzie
08/20/09

@ampersandparade: Yeah, but the kind of sad, scary clown that scars people for life.
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Maritsa promoted this comment babzie was starred babzie was unstarred

tirso
08/20/09

In reply to Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
I dunno, I would consider chipping in to pay Spencer Pratt to lie at the bottom of the pool...
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Yahtzii promoted this comment tirso was starred tirso was unstarred

BlondeGrlz
08/20/09

In reply to Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
Gah, double post. Apologies.
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Edited by BlondeGrlz at 08/20/09 9:46 AM BlondeGrlz was starred BlondeGrlz was unstarred

BlondeGrlz
08/20/09

In reply to Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
What Would Brian Boitano Make?
This is a South Park joke, right? Although it doesn't really matter, as I bet the cross section of people who watch South Park and the Food Network consists of: Me, maybe you, no one over age 30.
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Gretchen is a new kitten mom!
08/20/09

@BlondeGrlz: I'm 48 and I watch both shows. I'll admit I watch more South Park than FN though.
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Grim Reaper of the Forest
08/20/09

@BlondeGrlz: Seeing as how South Park debuted in 1997, I would bet there are many people in their 30s who watch both.
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LaComtesse
08/20/09

In reply to Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
Re District 9 sequel--of course. The movie flat out tells you there is going to be a sequel. However, I will be skipping that one. For those of you who have been on the fence, I recommend you skip District 9 as well.
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BlondeGrlz
08/20/09

@LaComtesse: I'm really surprised. My Twitter has been, uh, atwitter with positive remarks and the reviews I read were good as well.
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confusedforahotsecond is a sodemombeech!
08/20/09

@LaComtesse: Yesterday I read some pieces claiming that it is rather racist. Is that true?
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laureltreedaphne
08/20/09

@LaComtesse:

Really? I'm interested to know why you feel that way. I thought it was really great.
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LaComtesse
08/20/09

@BlondeGrlz: First 30 minutes is great and there's fun (if obvious) stuff to pick apart. The remaining hour and half or so is a generic action flick with aliens.
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Yahtzii
08/20/09

@confusedforahotsecond is a sodemombeech!: That's sort of ridiculous - the whole point is that it's an examination of racism and apartheid.
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LaComtesse
08/20/09

@confusedforahotsecond is a sodemombeech!: Ummm... I can see where one would say that. There's a plotline that involves traditional African medicine. Frankly, it's Hollywood-ized and in that way uses familiar images that I can see as being taken as racist, but from a sociological standpoint... not so much, it's pretty much tapping in to what some Africans believe. (If you've ever seen the show "Taboo," you'll see similar things being said in a documentary setting... only no aliens.)

@laureltreedaphne: As I said to BlondeGrlz, I thought the end was a bit typical/actiony. Nothing grabbed me after that first half hour, frankly.
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Yahtzii
08/20/09

@LaComtesse: I liked it! Sort of, I guess. I found it uncomfortable to watch, and I can't say that I "enjoyed" it, sort of like how I didn't "enjoy" A Clockwork Orange or even The Dark Knight. Turns out I like my sci-fi shiny and zoomy, and Zachary Quinto helps.
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LucyRed
08/20/09

@LaComtesse: I loved it! Documentary-esque delivery, intriguing, original suspenseful story, great actor, lots of double entendres and political ironies (yet doesn't bash you over the head with them all) and to top it off...just awesome action sequences.

Now a sequel? I'm only on board if they do it right - i.e. bring back the same people and write a helluva follow-up story. If it becomes just about the money, then the story has the potential to falter.
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Yahtzii promoted this comment LucyRed was starred LucyRed was unstarred

LaComtesse
08/20/09

@Yahtzii: I like my sci-fi with less dastardly villians and less gratuitous explosions. I prefer more grit... which at first there was plenty of, but then they had super-cool technology etc. etc.
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Yahtzii
08/20/09

@LaComtesse: Do you love Firefly? It has a pretty nice balance of grit and shiny. I bet you LOVE Alien and Blade Runner and so on. I love those movies and can actually watch them over and over, but I don't think I'd chose to rewatch District 9. And I'm not so sure I'll be in line for the sequel.
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LaComtesse
08/20/09

@LucyRed: "lots of double entendres and political ironies (yet doesn't bash you over the head with them all)"

Really? I thought the fact that it took place in South Africa already bashed you over the head with the political analogies.

But the documentary style was great: REALLY interesting... but they abandoned it for loooooooooong stretches at a time and then reintroduced it when they needed it, which I thought was kinda lazy at points. Also the whole premise of what happens to Wikus a) took a huge leap of faith and offered zero explanation b) wasn't necessary. There was another, more interesting way to get him involved in the aliens' world.
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Sputnik_Sweetheart
08/20/09

@Yahtzii: I really liked it, too. However, it was definitely hard to watch in places and I don't think I'll be running out to see it again.
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EkaterinaBallerina
08/20/09

@Yahtzii: I was going to say that at first the bit with the Nigerians made me uncomfortable, but then I remembered that when I lived in South Africa, I was bombarded with negativity around them. From everyone, be they white, black or Malay. I reserved my judgment, but it seems like what was portrayed about them in the film, is exactly how they are regarded in South Africa. Although the mention of the "scam" made me laugh because that's one of the things I was warned about, scams.
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LaComtesse
08/20/09

@Yahtzii: I love the IDEA of Firefly but not the execution... and Kaylee and Inara. I want that show to be so much better than it is, but Joss Whedon gets too cutesy for me when he doesn't have a defined beginning middle and end (as in "Serenity" which I loved and "Dr. Horrible" which I also loved.) Anyway, I digress... we can PM that one.
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TheUptightMidwesterner
08/20/09

@LaComtesse: I don't go to movies as a rule- and my friend more or less told me that I am seeing this movie with her this weekend or else we can no longer be friends. I also must note that this friend is such a cine-snob she thinks Manohla Dargis would give 4 stars to her dog taking a crap.
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Breamworthy
08/20/09

@LucyRed: political ironies (yet doesn't bash you over the head with them all)

Hmm. I felt totally bashed over the head, to the extent that I really didn't like the movie. I felt like the first 45 minutes at least was basically someone yelling at me "See how they treat the aliens? That's just like how they treated blacks during apartheid! Get it? Get it? Get it?" ad nauseum.
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LaComtesse
08/20/09

@TheUptightMidwesterner: Clearly I'm in the minority here, though I'd be happy to discuss it after you see it. I found it uneven, typical, and not especially compelling.
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EkaterinaBallerina
08/20/09

@Breamworthy: I read an interview with the director this morning and he mentioned that a lot of the interviews by the humans talking about the aliens were taken from interviews by South Africans talking about real aliens--Zimbabweans and elsewhere. And that's a different story. So I think you're a little off on what they're bashing you over the head with. Furthermore, apartheid? People are living in those exact conditions today. Those were real South African homes in the movie, homes that people had really just been evicted from. So it's not about apartheid really. It's about living and working conditions for South Africans and immigrants to South Africa today.
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Breamworthy
08/20/09

@EkaterinaBallerina: Just curious, because I don't know much about South Africa nowadays, are the illegal aliens who live in those conditions mostly black? Like is the native/alien thing mostly still a white/black issue, or is that not as much a part of the situation now?
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LaComtesse
08/20/09

@EkaterinaBallerina: Absolutely, but there were also blatant references to apartheid, particularly the "humans only" signs.
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Sidi-n-Baroka
08/20/09

@EkaterinaBallerina: I haven't seen the movie, but from what I've heard about from quite a number of Nigerians is that no-one really cared for it. I was told that the film played to the prejudice held against Nigerians by South Africans.
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LaComtesse promoted this comment Edited by Sidi-n-Baroka at 08/20/09 11:43 AM Sidi-n-Baroka was starred Sidi-n-Baroka was unstarred

sportz.star
08/20/09

In reply to Heidi & Spencer A "Nightmare"; Courtney Caught In Bed With What?
The David Copperfield story -- I feel like I'm having deja vu. I hope that TMZ is just picking up on the old story and not that there's another woman who claims to have been assaulted on that island.
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HaarzyLady
08/20/09

@sportz.star: Right? Not to down play this woman's experience, but wouldn't he threaten to make her disappear, not to kill her?
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ytuhermanotambien
08/20/09

@sportz.star: Either way, I think the lesson is, never go to David Copperfield's private island. Or, really, the private island of anyone you don't already know and trust. I mean, I can't imagine the island has any sort of objective police force to come to your rescue.
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