A Spanish anarchist that sometimes goes by the super-catchy name Anticlerical Pro Sex Toys Group says it sent explosive devices hidden within boxes of vibrators to prominent ultra-conservative Catholics in Spain, because nothing screams SUSPICIOUS when you’re an abstemious cleric than receiving a shipment of sex toys. Then again...
According to Spain’s state-owned news agency EFE, the anarchists have sent two such vibrator-cloaked mini-bombs. One of the devices exploded at a postal sorting office, slightly injuring a woman who was handling the package. The group was targeting the Catholic archbishop of Pamplona, Francisco Pérez, and the headteacher of a private school belonging to the extremely-conservative Legionnaires of Christ movement in Madrid. (The Legion of Christ was, by point of reference, founded in 1941 in Mexico by Marcial Marciel, who was accused of sexual misconduct in the 50s, 70s, and 90s, and eventually forced by the Vatican to retire to a life of “penitence and silence” in 2006).
Police in Spain believe that the group (which has also gone by the name Artisans Club for New Uses of Coffee) is also responsible for a bomb packed into a pressure cooker and left near the public prosecutor’s office in Madrid, as well as a “rudimentary” bomb found in Madrid’s Almudena Cathedral. These terrifying discoveries, reported in the wake of the Boston Marathon bombing, were appended with a warning from the anarchists that their Catholic targets could expect more packages in the future: “Please accept our apologies. Next time we won't fail.”
Ever get the feeling sometimes that the world is just teeming with terrible people? Anyone who makes us sympathize with the Catholic Church must be truly despicable.
Image via Getty, Peter Macdiarmid