Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker—a man who once proposed slashing funding to victims of child abuse, who’s actively trying to end his state’s living wage, and who’s all on board for banning abortion after 20 weeks with no exceptions for rape or incest—took time away from his busy schedule of destroying the social safety net to announce he’s running for President.

Walker announced today that he’s formally in the running, three days after his Twitter account accidentally announced it for him. There’s a video:

“America needs new fresh leadership, big bold ideas, from outside of Washington,” Walker says, after a montage of him striding around the state in a tucked-in Harley Davidson T-shirt. “Actually get things done. [sic] Wisconsin, we didn’t nibble around the edges. We enacted big, bold reforms and took power out of the hands of big government special interests and gave it to the hardworking taxpayers.”

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At the same time, Walker’s college-aged children Alex and Matt penned a piece on Walker’s influence on them: “Our Dad has shown us how to be compassionate and how to care for people. He didn’t inherit fame or fortune from his parents, but what he did inherit was a big heart. He’s always welcoming to family and friends.” What a broad and generous use of the word “compassionate.”

Walker joins fellow wackjobs Donald Trump, Ted Cruz and Ben Carson, all of whom are already doing a good job taking away his momentum. For now, he’s campaigning under the slogan “Reform. Growth. Safety.” and a Cubist flag rectangle of a logo.


Contact the author at anna.merlan@jezebel.com.

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Image via AP.