The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge showed up to the London Marathon on Sunday to hand out water and cheer on runners, and how was their kindness repaid? With a torrent of water to the face. “I told you mingling with the commoners was a terribly base idea,” says the smirk of Kate Middleton, her shining hair gleaming in the early spring sun.

Here they are, racking up goodwill with the hoi polloi, pretending to enjoy themselves as the sweaty peasants drag their broken, disgusting bodies over the course of 26.2 miles.

“I touched the last one. It’s your turn again.”

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But before another bottle of water could be dispensed...disaster.

Kate is calm and collected—suspiciously calm. I bet she paid that runner to douse her husband so she never has to return to the lousy London Marathon ever again.

Look at that. She’s thrilled. Her plan went off without a hitch.

“Ahaha! You sure got me, you cheeky wanker!” Prince William appears to laugh. Then, to his bodyguard: “Finish him.”

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All images via Chris Jackson/Getty.