On Thursday, Rob Kardashian—with the help of Blac Chyna—casually informed the world that he once (?) harbored a crush on his older sister, Kim. Several days of marinating on it have not made this news any less strange. To the video!
This puzzling revelation came during an interview with E!, in which he and his baby momma/fiancée discussed their childhood crushes. “Her childhood crush was Ricky Martin,” Rob said, barely able to contain his laughter at such an utterly embarrassing admission. Chyna conceded he was right, launching into a Livin’ La Vida Loca chair dance. And his?
“J.Lo,” she sang. “That’s pretty accurate,” he smiled sheepishly.
“J.Lo and Kim Kardashian,” she said, and the two stared into each other’s eyes, basking momentarily in some secret mirth that makes my stomach grimace.
“That’s also pretty accurate,” he said.
“These are facts,” she said. And then the video just ENDS, because what else is there to talk about?
In fairness, Kim has been beautiful ever since she walked out of Kris Jenner’s womb, fully made up and on the list of every L.A. club worth its bathroom attendant. And the Daily News scrounged up a licensed psychotherapist to try to to explain away the inherent ickiness of the thing:
“Sometimes when kids are young, they idolize an older sibling and they think that that idolization is something different,” Kaiser said. “So it may feel like a crush — that he wants to be like her, that he’s drawn to her, that he thinks she’s special. In that case, that is normal.”
This is also in keeping with the bananas history of the entire Kardashian empire and each of their satellite kingdoms, so it’s probably not weird at all. It’s probably not weird at all! It’s probably not weird at all.