Oh Thank God, Donald Trump and Fox Have Resolved Their Feud 

Please exhale, because Donald Trump and Fox have finally resolved their two-week long lover’s quarrel, which began after Fox anchor Megyn Kelly asked Trump reasonable questions during the first Republican debate, and Trump responded presidentially by whining about it relentlessly while insinuating that Kelly is a heavily-menstruating bimbo.

CNN’s Brian Stelter reports that the Trump and Fox camps are telling very different stories about why the enraged animated Creamsicle didn’t grace any Fox shows for a long 14 days. Fox sources told Stelter it was because CEO Roger Ailes was enraged over Trump’s comments about Kelly, particularly the numerous shitty tweets he sent when Kelly had just returned from vacation.

On August 25, Ailes demanded an apology from Trump for the “unprovoked attack” on the anchor, giving Fox a rare opportunity for the true moral high ground:

“Donald Trump’s surprise and unprovoked attack on Megyn Kelly during her show last night is as unacceptable as it is disturbing. Megyn Kelly represents the very best of American journalism and all of us at FOX News Channel reject the crude and irresponsible attempts to suggest otherwise. I could not be more proud of Megyn for her professionalism and class in the face of all of Mr. Trump’s verbal assaults. Her questioning of Mr. Trump at the debate was tough but fair, and I fully support her as she continues to ask the probing and challenging questions that all presidential candidates may find difficult to answer.

Donald Trump rarely apologizes, although in this case, he should. We have never been deterred by politicians or anyone else attacking us for doing our job, much less allowed ourselves to be bullied by anyone and we’re certainly not going to start now. All of our journalists will continue to report in the fair and balanced way that has made FOX News Channel the number one news network in the industry.”

Trump didn’t apologize, though he did confine himself to merely complaining about other Fox guests, as Stelter points out:

A source “close to Trump” tells Stelter that actually, he didn’t appear on Fox for two weeks because of scheduling conflicts.

This devastating Cold War will be ended at 8 p.m. on Tuesday, when Bill O’Reilly interviews Trump, and spring will return the next night, when he runs headlong into the manly embrace of Sean Hannity.

What a terrible and trying time we didn’t realize we were living through.

Trump at a September 3 press conference. Photo via AP Images