Newlywed Bride Accused of Pushing Her Husband Off a CliffS

Coming soon to Investigation Discovery (Happily Never After, obv, not that I spend all my time watching salacious murder shows, because I DON'T, KIND OF), here's a tale of a young couple who only enjoyed one week of marital bliss before the wife allegedly shoved her new husband off a cliff.

Actually, it sounds like there was no "bliss" involved whatsoever—the bride had reportedly told friends that she had second thoughts about their marriage, and hinted (genuinely or not—we really don't have enough details to even speculate) that she felt unsafe. A week after the wedding, the two began fighting and decided to go hiking in Glacier National Park (TOTALLY NORMAL) to sort shit out.

Then bad things happened:

Graham told police that her husband grabbed her by the arm. She turned and removed it.

"Graham stated she could have just walked away, but due to her anger, she pushed Johnson with both hands in the back and as a result, he fell face first off the cliff," the complaint read.

His body was discovered several days later.

Graham's attorney, Michael Donahoe, declined to comment on the case.

According to the complaint, Graham reportedly told a friend she planned to talk with Johnson about her reservations on July 7. The same day, Graham sent the friend a text message saying, "Oh well, I'm about to talk to him."

The friend responded, "I'll pray for you guys."

Graham wrote back: "But dead serious if u don't hear from me at all again tonight, something happened."

This is really beside the point, and I obviously don't endorse murder OF ANY KIND, etc., but pushing somebody off a cliff during a hike has to be the easiest perfect crime ever. It's like, oh, we were just doing that completely socially acceptable form of recreational-walking-next-to-a-dangerous-cliff! As long as you don't tell anyone in advance that you two are in a fight and you hate that guy, couldn't your police interview just go like this?

Police: "Hey, how did that guy die?"

You: "He fell off that cliff we were walking next to."

Police: "Yep, checks out. TTYL."

Anyway, regarding this case, condolences to everyone affected. People, don't murder each other.

Image via Galyna Andrushko/Shutterstock.