Need A Professional Lying Service? There's A Company For That

Paladin Deception Services, the self-proclaimed “The Leading Fictitious Reference Provider,” can “put together almost any fictitious scenario that you require.”

The mysterious website (featuring chess pieces and meditative quotes on deception) seems like it’s part of a covert ad campaign for a Wes Anderson movie. But it’s real!

Paladin Deception Services is here to assist you in obtaining the fictitious reference, the little white lie, or the alibi that you need. Our agency can provide you with either male or female testimonials over the phone in the local area code that you require. We’re confidential, professional, innovative, and affordable. Most importantly, we keep it legal. Get the verification that you need!

For only $54 (and $19.95 for each additional month), you get set up with a phone number, alibi verification and even options including “Creation of a Fictitious Boss (Past or Present or a Human Resources Manager” and Verification of a White Lie or Exaggeration Custom-Made to Add the “Truth” that you need.”

“ Is it legal to use fictitious references on a resume or application?” you may wonder. “Yes, it is perfectly legal! As long as you follow the guidelines set forth under Paladin Deception Services TERMS.” Don’t tell my boss, but this is how I’ve kept my true identity as a 65-year-old insurance salesman named Ross under wraps.

Potential customers, please mind this disclaimer: “Even after a stellar performance on the part of Paladin Deception Services, we cannot guarantee whatsoever as to you getting hired by anyone or that your disinformation package will not fall under suspicion.” There really is no such thing as a free lunch/liar-for-hire.

Forbes‘ Jeff Bercovici looked into the website after seeing an advertisement pop up on his Facebook; as a result, the social media site removed it for a “few reasons.” Facebook has a blanket rule against advertising anything that it deems an “unacceptable business model.” I guess they weren’t swayed by the Leon Trotsky quote on the bottom of Paladin Deception Services’ FAQ: “The end may justify the means as long as there is something that justifies the end.” Deep.