I don’t know how to be funny about how deeply I’m in love with Keri Russell by herself, Matthew Rhys by himself, and Keri Russell and Matthew Rhys together. They are a perfect couple that I both covet (to own? I don’t know) and envy and want to sit between and be an equal third party in. Watching them be in love fills me up and it also empties me out. Have I become too creepy? Cut me off—I am sick but I don’t wanna get better.

Russell and Rhys were on Thursday’s Watch What Happens Live! to promote their perfect and unnervingly prescient show The Americans, but they also explained that their love (they only got together when they started production on the show a few years ago, but now share a baby) was lifelong. Rhys, he says, drunkenly asked for her number at a kickball party (what could that be?) when she was 26. I am faint, hold me, both of you.