Hey, remember when Justin Bieber's baby monkey got seized by German customs? (NOT A EUPHEMISM, PERVS.) Well, instead of going all Not Without My Monkey-Son on the German boy-king or whatever, Bieber was just like "w-evs," and didn't even fucking bother to send in the the required vaccination and import papers to get his monkey back. So that monkey is German now. It will grow up eating Deutsch-nanas and speaking monkey-German instead of cavorting about the Bieber bus in a pair of drop-crotch diapers.
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