It's Time We Gave Avril Lavigne an Intervention

Avril Lavigne, you are just shy of thirty. The gigantic engagement ring that appears on your finger in the “Here’s to Never Growing Up” video was given to you by an old blond wizard named Chad Kroeger. You pay taxes, you’ve been divorced, you own a home. You already have grown up, sun child, and no amount of smeared eyeliner and talking about singing along to Radiohead (who, by the way, is a very grownup band) is going to change those circumstances. Guess what? I have smeared eyeliner, too, and it’s not because I think it looks punk rock — it’s because I’m sleepy and rub my eyes all of the time, which is a grown woman’s reality.

Don’t fear maturity, flaxen baby woman. All those things that you’re still singing about like sneaking out with alcohol and falling in love? You can still do them. In fact, you can do them even more because being a grownup, despite the responsibilities, can be really fun and freeing.

Letting go of the glory days of “Complicated” and “Sk8er Boi” is scary, we know, but we think that you can do it. Do not be afraid. No one will take your tiara. No one will take away your loose tie. The only difference is that we now call it “the men’s wear look” and you’re expected to pair it with some nice slacks.

Kidding! Wear what you want because you’re a grownup and you can!