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The Jesus piece is a thing of the past, my friends; the smoking hot new trend in flexing both your allegiance to the Bible and your enormous rapper wealth is, apparently, a gold chain of La Virgen, St. Pablo, and maybe some other dudes made by rap’s most devoted God man, Kanye West.

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West has been threatening to launch a jewelry collection to accompany his wealth of distressed oversized sweatshirts and he’s finally done it: a collaboration with Jacob the Jeweler (obvi!) that Vogue hilariously writes was “inspired by 14th-century Florentine art, such as Donatello’s bas-relief portraits, and evoke a certain classical romance.” Classical romance! Honey, in my house these things are called religious medals and for the most part the only things they are evoking are my Tío Manny in the ‘70s and Frank freakin’ Serpico, feel me?

Well, I guess that is if Frank Serpico were a jillionaire, because they do not come cheap: the above chains retail for $10,780 and $11,960 respectively, which seems rather... prohibitive, though you do get the added benefit of owning gold that you can melt down and trade for food whenever the apocalypse happens. (Is that sacrilege? Only if you’ve had them blessed, I guess.) Also, if you happen to be a very rich fan of Kanye’s music, you can purchase two rings that say “A God Dream,” referencing his best song from The Life of Pablo. Those specific pieces do not, I presume, evoke classical romance, unless perhaps you’re going to use them as wedding rings, in which case it would be sweet.

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