Here Comes the Nanny Police

Paranoid parents have progressed from spying on their own nannies via traditional methods (camera in the teddy bear, cross-examining toddlers) to spying on other people’s nannies and posting about their alleged indiscretions on the internet. Is anyone surprised?

Judging from this Wall Street Journal report, the most egregious stuff is hidden away on private bourgie Brooklyn neighborhood listservs, but we took a look at “Nanny Sightings” and “I Saw Your Nanny” to keep you informed about all the evil nannies out and about.

The Nanny Who Cared More About Her Acrylic Nails Than Her Baby:

…nanny spent over an hour getting acrylic nails & waxing. had dd next to her at all times but didn’t talk to her, play w/ her at all. dd made lots of cute “ba ba ba” sounds and pointed at me when i waved at her but didn’t interact w/ or respond to nanny at all. i don’t want to suggest that nanny was harmful or dangerous but she certainly seemed negligent & entirely disinterested in baby. hope this is helpful. good luck.

(via Nanny Sightings)

The Nanny Who Talked Shit While Her Charge Wasn’t Listening:

NY Kids Club, approx 2:25 pm, Friday, 87th st location, white mid 20s sitter, reddish brown curly hair pulled back in a pony tail, watching 4 yo blonde girl before her gym class. Sitter was being nasty and had a foul look on her face. Kid was not misbehaving, sitter was just in a bad mood. After the gym teacher came out to pick up 2:30 class, she walks out and actually said out loud :”One whole hour of freedom from watching the brat”

(via Nanny Sightings)

The Nanny Who Got Mad When Her Kid Broke Her iPhone:

Small park off of Providence Road right beside Presbyterian Hospital. Tues., March 12, 2013. 3-4pm. There was a nanny (Caucasian with short dark hair in her 20’s) in charge of two small boys (around ages 3-5 with sandy blonde hair). She hardly interacted with them, but when she did, she was very unpleasant. The oldest boy accidentally knocked over her tea, which somehow caused her iPhone to crack, and she was very ugly to him. I was shocked at how cold she was to them.

(via I Saw Your Nanny)

The Nanny Who — GASP — Let a Baby Scream:

At Bloomingdale branch of NY Public Library on West 100th St., a dark-skinned nanny with very short curly hair, responsible for a baby boy less than a year old in a dark blue/black baby carriage with a gray hood. She stayed with him in the hallway talking to another nanny who was responsible for a baby girl. The nanny let the baby boy scream for easily 30 minutes, and looked like she was so annoyed with him. When I finally saw him out of the carriage, she was sort of holding him but there was no love or caring. I was shocked and thought that the parents should know because if this is occurring every day it will seriously impact the happiness of this child. The boy was wearing a light blue one piece with thin white stripes.

(via I Saw Your Nanny)

Perhaps we should cut NYC parents some slack — last year’s horrific Upper West Side nanny stabbing probably accounts for some of this paranoia — but, in most cases, it’s unhelpful to make a rash snap judgment (literally; some posters provide photos, as seen above) without knowing any context. Would you really be all smiles and butterflies if your kid broke your iPhone? Haven’t you ever let a baby cry, as babies so often tend to do? The WSJ notes that the Park Slope Parents listserv put extensive guidelines in place for nanny reporting in 2006, after a listserv member posted about twins who weren’t dressed warmly enough and the nanny in question turned out to be the twins’ grandmother. Oops! Time is better spent hiring trustworthy nannies than it is scouring the internet for their possible “Missed Connections”-esque mistakes.

Those who don’t want to promote public snitching can also get “How’s My Nanny” stroller license plates; “concerned citizens” can email in with reports of nannies acting inappropriately or completing a “noteworthy positive interaction,” although the founder says the site receives five times more negative reports than positive ones. Again: not surprised.