Food Blogger Eats Cat Food, Toothpaste, and Other Weird Crap

If you’ve ever wondered what cat food tastes like: not good, according to an adventurous food blogger who plays Iron Chef with food products formerly known as “inedible.”

Here’s Another Goddam Footblog (tagline: Sick of pretentious food blogs? Me too.) on shitty cat food stir fry:

1% edible. This is a very challenging dish to eat. There are nice enough flavours from the spices, vegetables and sauces but the cat food lends a weird flavour and horrid texture to the dish: I can still taste that sulphorous and burnt rubber and I feel a bit ill. The dish also makes my mouth produce an alarming amount of saliva so I end up drooling all over the place.

On grass (which became shitty pesto):

It. Is. HORRIBLE. The combination of wasabe peas and pasta and, well, everything else, is just bad. Really bad. The grass, because it has been blended, now tastes super grassy and adds to the overall horribleness. But the very worse comes when I realise I AM EATING GRASS! FROM GLASGOW GREEEN! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!!

WRONG WITH ME!!

On toothpaste (shitty creme brulee!):

I’m struggling to find an analogy and the best I can come up with is that bit at the end of The Fly where Brundlefly gets combined with the telepod and forms some kind of indescribable horror who’s only wish is to be killed. This thing … it’s runny, granular, gloopy and the caramel crust is just plain weird and rubbery. It tastes like gritty eggy toothpaste. I doubt even if I had used the smallest amount of toothpaste would this have worked.