Florida Woman Attacked By Bear Practically in Her Own Home

A woman in Lake Mary, Florida was attacked by a bear who was on her property rooting through garbage, looking for food.

OH DEAR GOD THE BEARS ARE COMING AFTER US. I’m sorry. That was unprofessional. Let’s get back to the terrifying news story, via CNN:

The woman said as many as five bears “of various sizes” were rooting through her trash when she walked into the garage, Seminole County Sheriff’s Lt. Pete Brenenstuhl said. A black bear “dragged her from inside the garage out into her driveway,” leaving her with scrapes and cuts to her face and legs, Brenenstuhl said. The woman escaped and ran back into her home, where her husband called 911, he said. She was taken to a nearby hospital for treatment.

Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission spokesman Greg Workman said initial reports that several bears had attacked the woman were wrong. “There were several bears observed near the area, but one bear is responsible for her injuries.”

Wildlife officials are cautioning people in the region that black bears and their cubs are moving around in search for food after the long, grueling Florida winter. They strongly urge people to use bear-resistant trash cans, which I also strongly, strongly urge those people to do. I feel like this is the appropriate time to be grateful I don’t live in a place where there is a need to sell something like “bear-resistant trash cans.” Although, I do live in Texas and my landlord just emailed a thing about what to do if you find a snake on your patio, so—wash?