Dude Gets Aroused by Fat Ladies Chewing Their Fingernails Off

Oh, humans! You get engorged over the darndest things. I have to admit, when I first read about this fat-lady-fingernail-biting fetishist, my first thought was "You do you, little soldier!" and my second thought was, "...Wait...how much can I charge?" Because for reals—as a fat lady with fingernails and teeth—if this takes off and becomes a thing, I could make some serious bucks. (If anyone out there is looking for a new fetish, CONSIDER FAT-LADY-FINGERNAIL-BITING. Mama wants to buy an L-shaped sofa.)

Anyway, here's the scoop:

For an otherwise normal, 23-year-old male patient described by the Wisconsin psychiatrist Austin McSweeny in 1972, the most arousing sexual fantasy was the image of an obese woman nibbling at her nails...

"He could [only] become sexually aroused and experience penile erection by seeing or fantasizing the fingernails of a woman as they were being bitten by her. Occasionally, the mere sight of a woman’s severely bitten fingernails would cause the patient to experience a spontaneous erection … When the patient experienced the proper fetish situation, he could masturbate to the point of ejaculation and experience gratification. This was his only means of expressing his sex drive."

The psychotherapist’s request for the man to picture heterosexual intercourse or a vagina in his mind’s eye was enough to make him vomit.

Just the thought of PIV makes you vomit, bro? That is an impressive level of commitment! The 1972 interview mentions that fingernail-boner guy was extremely ashamed of and self-conscious about his fetish. Here's hoping that in the intervening years he's grown more comfortable with himself and found a community of fat fingers where he can really let it fly. There's room for all kinds. (All safe, consensual kinds.)

Image via Doruk Sikman/Shutterstock.