Somehow we missed this but the video for "Everybody" — a track featuring Doug E. Fresh that will appear on Michelle Obama's hip hop album, which is a real thing that exists — features Dr. Oz rapping. While wearing scrubs and a stethoscope.

There's a statement from FLOTUS; and Jordin Sparks, Ryan Beatty and the Hip Hop MD also appear in the clip, but Dr. Oz's flow stands out. And by "stands out" I mean "is terrible and ridiculous." Also, if anyone truly believes this is an effective way to reach kids, allow me to laugh heartily in your general direction.