CW Turns Mary Queen of Scots' Blood-Soaked Story into Sexy Teen Drama

Mary, Queen of Scots — also known as Mary Stuart or Mary I Of Scotland — was executed at the age of 25 44, but before that, she was queen regnant of Scotland and then queen consort of France. Now she’s being brought back to life in Reign, a new series on the CW, home of Gossip Girl and The Carrie Diares.

I like teen drama as much as the next woman too old to admit it, and I read all the smutty historical romance I can get my hands on, but it’s kind of weird to think of Mary’s dark story becoming a sudsy primetime network soap. Just seems like HBO’s territory! Consider her death, as reported by Wikipedia:

Mary was not beheaded with a single strike. The first blow missed her neck and struck the back of her head. The second blow severed the neck, except for a small bit of sinew, which the executioner cut through using the axe. Afterward, he held her head aloft and declared, “God save the Queen.” At that moment, the auburn tresses in his hand turned out to be a wig and the head fell to the ground, revealing that Mary had very short, grey hair. A small dog owned by the queen, a Skye terrier, is said to have been hiding among her skirts, unseen by the spectators. Following the beheading, it refused to be parted from its owner’s body and was covered in her blood, until it was forcibly taken away and washed.

The CW’s series begins a lot years earlier, when Mary arrives in France as a 15-year-old betrothed to Prince Francis. As the network puts it, viewers will see “The secret history of survival at French Court amidst fierce foes, dark forces, and a world of sexual intrigue.” Which means I will be watching the crap out of it. Bit of trivia: When Mary showed up in France she had an entourage, including four girls her own age, all ALSO named Mary. How very Heathers. Maybe the CW is the right choice after all.