If you're an 18-year-old adult woman on the fence about whether or not your parents "should" "let" you go to college, fret no more! The internet provides, as always, in the form of this staggeringly terrible listicle from FixTheFamily.com (which, as far as I can tell, is a machine where you put in Catholicism and the ramblings of a sexually dysfunctional medieval barber-surgeon come out). Their advice? KEEP THE WOMAN-PROPERTY AWAY FROM THE DANGEROUS THINK-BOOKS.
I could just go through and make fun of all the idiotic contortions this Catholic dad goes through to justify his stance that women should be barred from higher education—but, oh dear, he's expecting it (ad hominem attacks!!11!1!!!!1):
Both of these positions we have are a threat to the trophies of the feminist agenda, so the rejection we receive is always emotionally charged and ends up insulting, since once explained logically, the opposition runs out of substance and is only left to hurl insults and presume and misconstrue this practical wisdom into some chauvinistic evil.
Oh, okay. I wouldn't want to "misconstrue" your statements like, "women should submit to their husbands" as "chauvinistic." Sorry for my insubstantial, illogical insult-hurling! (I always soak my insults in menstrual clots before I hurl them to make sure they're fully emotionally charged.)
Instead, since Raylan Alleman tooooootally knows everything I'm going to say already, how about fuck that guy. I don't even want to talk to that guy. I want to talk to that guy's daughters, and the daughters of all the other controlling, oppressive fathers (and complicit mothers), religious or not, who spend more time thinking about their daughters' vaginas than their brains.
Dear good Catholic daughters, and daughters in general, and anyone who has ever come into contact with the teachings of a kookooroo like Raylan Alleman:
1. You do not have to obey.
It's okay if you don't believe me right now—I'm just going to keep hammering this one point over and over again for the rest of my life, just to do my part to ensure the message is there, steadfast and unequivocal, any time someone needs it. Contrary to what people might have told you, your life is yours—not your father's, not your husband's, not the Pope's, not some radical internet creep's. People who come at you with shit like this are liars with their own best interests in mind, not yours: