Century Gothic Is the New Comic Sans

By Kelly Stout  |  January 17, 2017 | 11:55pm
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Remember how, in 2011 or thereabout, everyone was all mad at Comic Sans for the crime of being ugly and dopey? Those days are gone. Gibraltar crumbled, Rome fell, and Comic Sans has descended from its cheaply upholstered sans serif throne in the community reading room at the San Rafael Public Library.

Century Gothic has risen.

What century? 20th, one supposes, since that is the century in which you attended eighth grade and used this font to make business cards for the fake cereal company that you founded as part of your social studies unit on advertising. (It was called Maternity Munchies, and was aimed at pregnant women who have just a little bit of an edge going, and was a very good idea, but that’s neither here nor there.) It was also during the 20th century that you watched a lot of films entitled things like “Our Expanding Universe” when you had a sub in sixth-grade life sciences because your real teacher was out with what was rumored to be a “sex injury.”

In that same century perhaps you turned in a paper on “the Epic of Gilgamesh,” on which you received a “needs improvement,” in this font.

It could also be the 21st century, though, because that was the century in which your stepmom used this font, in gold against a maroon background, on the holiday card that didn’t mention you even though you promptly responded to her October email requesting “relevant updates.”

Indeed, it was in this century that the office manager at your veterinarian began using this in her email signature below her persistent reminders that your dog’s heartworm medication is ready for pickup and there is a $15 fee to hold it over night.

Come to think of it, that real estate broker who repeatedly referred to the “Lower West Side” also used it on his business cards.

And that copy and mail place near your apartment that sells off-brand gummy frogs and carries non-standards envelope sizes uses it on its sign.

It is the century of Century Gothic and it is terrible. Goodbye, Comic Sans.

 
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