A Show Called Jane The Virgin Might Be the Next Thing on Your DVR

Not content with reliving the eventual demise of Mary Queen of Scots, the CW is attempting a remake of the Venezuelan show Juana La Virgen for their next block of For Teens But Grown Women Love It programming. And yes, translated, Juana La Virgen means Jane The Virgin.

Deadline reports that the show is about the aforementioned Jane, “a hard-working, religious girl who, due to a series of outrageous events, is accidentally artificially inseminated.” It feels like “outrageous” is kind of downplaying becoming a real-life Virgin Mary, but whatever: The rest of the plot of the original show involves the man whose sperm was impregnated in Jane falling in love with her even though he is married to another woman.

Jane The Virgin is being brought to American audiences in part by Ben Silverman, who is the reason you saw Ugly Betty, which was also adapted from a Spanish-language show, Yo Soy, Betty La Fea. At least that show, while possessing a too-literal title as well, was a more of your classic “ugly ducking becomes a swan” type story. Jane The Virgin is more of your classic “accidentally knocked up seemed to work for ABC Family with Switched at Birth, so let’s make our version totally bizarre” story.

As is the case with these things, there’s a good chance the name will be changed before it ever gets to our screens (R.I.P. Jane The Virgin), so let’s propose some possible options:

Jane, Miracle (Not Yet A) Woman
I Went to High School and All I Got Was Artificially Inseminated
Jane Who Never Said ‘Just the Tip, Just for a Second, Just to See How it Feels’ But Got Fucked (Metaphorically) Anyway

You can watch the original show on Hulu. And yes, the art for Juana La Virgen does consist of a man and a woman surrounded by artist renderings of sperm trying desperately to fertilize an egg.