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Wedding Bells, Not Bumps, For Moss And Doherty?

Illustration for article titled Wedding Bells, Not Bumps, For Moss And Doherty?
  • Is a bridal line in Kate Moss's future? Her boyfriend, supposedly sober Pete Doherty, says that if he can stay clean, he hopes to marry Moss this summer. We say there's as good a chance of that happening as there is our voting for Giuliani in 2008. [Yahoo News]
  • New names being tossed around to replace Rosie O'Donnell. Yay, the gays! Sex and the City's Mario Cantone and Ross "The Intern" Mathews (of Tonight Show fame) are both being considered for the gig. [E!]
  • Speaking of the gays, Jerusalem's Gay Pride Parade went off without a hitch this year. And by "without a hitch" we mean, aside from those 18 arrests of ultra-orthodox Jews during the parade, including one who attempted to bomb it. [BBC]
  • And while we're still on the topic, maybe-homophobe Isaiah Washington continues his reign of victimhood, now saying that it is his Grey's Anatomy castmate T.R. Knight who should have been fired from the show, not him. Dude! Get over it! []
  • Wes Craven is suing his neighbor Pauly Shore, claiming that water seeped from Shore's property onto his own and caused major damage. Wow: Pauly Shore and Wes Craven are neighbors? That's fucking hilarious. [USA Today]
  • No porn or booze for Australian Aborigines. Glad to know that colonial paternalism is still alive and well! [CNN]
  • First it was the whales, then the dolphins, and now all we can do is worry about the seals. Haven't marine mammals been through enough?! [Reuters]
  • 9 U.S. casualties identified today. [DoD]

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"Michael Richard Zacharof, an Aleut and former tribal president from the Bering Sea village of St. Paul, pleaded guilty this week to one count of violating the Marine Mammal Protection Act.

Federal law forbids the sale of any raw marine mammal parts unless they have been crafted into pieces of Alaska Native artwork.

In Zacharof's case, the former tribal leader sold the raw seal penises to a gift shop catering to customers from Asia. The shop then sold the items for about $100 each, according to the Justice Department.

Assistant U.S. Attorney Andrea Steward said seal penis bones, also known as seal sticks, are believed to have properties similar to erectile dysfunction drugs like Viagra."

is this the bullshit that passes for "cultural preservation" whenever they okay quotas for seal hunting? raw seal penis artwork? who knew this Pier 1 crap was so edgy?

and the seal "sticks"? this is evolution all backwards. if you're a guy who can't get it up and therefore can't reproduce, then your genes should dry up and disappear. why kill a perfectly healthy creature so you can use a sperm crutch for the rest of your life?