Oh Drew, Drew Drew. Who airbrushed this picture of you? Because it looks like they used the 1976 edition of Photohop. We can only assume the hatchet job is part of the fact that you're cool with the fact that you're skinny now (a size 4, if you were wondering, which you weren't) because, really, nothing's changed, because you're Drew! And you're madly in love, and sooooo happy now. And so perfect for an issue of Vogue that is all about POWER! (Power Up! Power Vows! Power Detox!) The fact that you are not only a wholly-inoffensive actress and makeup endorser but the PRODUCER of such monumental films as Never Been Kissed is an inspiration to us all! Sort of like the story of Vogue contributing editor Lauren Davis's marriage to a soft drink-heir in Colombia. (She wore a $200,000 Nina Ricci wedding dress!) But anyway, we're puking ahead of ourselves. After the jump, Jezebel's Maria-Mercedes and Intern Cheryl decode the coverlines to better reflect Vogue's real message.

Graphic by Cheryl Campbell